#16 - March 23rd, 2005

So are you enjoying the rain ? What about the thunder and lightning ? It's been quite a display so far and we're not done yet, so I'm reliably informed. Nevertheless we need it. No doubt from late April until October it will be as dry as a bone and often very hot in these parts and the muddy backroads and soggy clothing will be merely a pleasant memory…..
On a visit to San Francisco a couple of weeks ago I apparently caught some form of 'bird flu' from mingling with those City pigeons and other unsavory characters and as a result was nest-ridden for five days - thus my absence from these pages last week. Just thought you should be aware that I was not otherwise detained or guilty of a dereliction of duty…..
As regular readers will no doubt be aware, Turkey Vultures do like to eat out. Up here in Anderson Valley, and the surrounding region of Mendocino County, this is often a very rewarding pastime although I feel I should mention one prevailing unsettling circumstance I continue to endure. At a number of establishments where I have enjoyed some of my favorite dining experiences the absence of any background music results in my very keen ears being bombarded by the conversations and clattering cutlery of other diners. I have rarely experienced this elsewhere but it seems to be a trend or rather a fixture up here at many restaurants. Obviously music which takes over the room would be most inappropriate but a little gentle classical, or something equally unobtrusive in the background, would be most welcome. Not just to take the edge off either the deafening silence in between people's conversations when they bang away with their utensils or the actual comments of the more loud guests' themselves but also to add to the ambience…Just a thought…..
As much as a Vulture enjoys his or her eating times, there is almost as much satisfaction to be gleaned from a visit to The County Dump. My visit this past week was enlightened by a fascinating conversation with Ron the Dump Guy. He was in a cheery yet reflective mood as we discussed the ambiguities of his job and in particular some of the restrictions listed on the sign at the entrance to The Dump. Ron's current dilemma is the general public's confusion resulting from the sign's lack of clarity concerning glass and plastic.
Glass bottles are accepted but not glass ware or glass windows; plastic bottles are welcome but not plastic bags. The 'powers that be' seem to think that the sign is clear enough but I would respectfully suggest that it is not and that perhaps a new design might be in order. Apart from the glass/plastic issue, another possible amendment might be the list of items NOT accepted being much larger than the list of things which are admissible. However, there is no doubt about the County's feeling concerning one item on the sign - "No Dead Animals" - a decision which is very disappointing for those of us with a preying disposition. Too bad. I pointed this out to Ron and he replied, "If you're up here long enough you'll see everything…" …What could he possibly mean ?
If the driver of the white truck, license plate # 5W612??, were to start travelling by the M.T.A. bus service instead of threatening the safety of others with his skills, or lack thereof, behind the wheel, then the roads and highways of the Valley would be more secure places for us all…Only my opinion of course…..
Wine of the Week…The Pinot Noir from the Valley's Lazy Creek Vineyards. Served with loin lamb chops in rosemary, garlic, and white pepper, it proved to be a most wonderful experience which I would have liked to have shared with others but greed prevented me from doing so…..
Whine of the Week…As someone who jumps at every chance to praise local businesses and their achievements, I should also bring to your attention any occasions when standards slip… Recently, early one Friday evening, along with a number of fellow vultures, all Valley residents, I was on the prowl for fresh carrion in the Valley. We entered a local food establishment and were immediately informed by a clearly irritated local restaurateur that many items on the menu were not available. Furthermore, he brusquely informed us, there would be a very long wait for any food we ordered and that we would have to take it with us as he was closing the serving area in twenty minutes…..
One would have thought that when a small business owner has the chance of some extra business he would seize the opportunity gratefully, particularly in the Valley at this time of year. If he was thinking we were tourists and probably would never see us again then surely that is still no excuse for his attitude. Why not stay open an extra few minutes and create a little goodwill for heaven's sake ? Oh well, I do not wish to be too harsh and, having worked in the restaurant/bar business for many, many years, I can accept that he had his opening hours and perhaps he was having a bad day or had something important to do - it was not a big deal I suppose…..
However, it was what he said next which everyone in our flock found annoying. Clearly disappointed, we turned to leave and he simply explained away the situation with the comment, "Welcome to Boonville"…We were shocked. When used in this sarcastic way, as if to point out the town's inefficiency, the person is making a very inaccurate generalization about the Valley. His unfriendly attitude together with this inappropriate comment does not reflect the Valley in a fair light and hopefully the guy will think twice before making such a remark about Boonville in this context at any time in the future….Maybe I should have a word in his ear…or even soil his window…whadya think ?…..
In an unrelated thought, why is it that parents of small children never fail to point out, to anyone who will listen, just how smart their kids are and yet the world is full of dumb adults ? What happens ? I think we should be told…..
Signs of Spring # 7 - The reappearance of the horseshoe players alongside the Navarro Store. It was 11.30am on a Thursday morning and clearly all was well with the world at the Deep End of the Valley…..and #8 - Spring sports are upon us. Driving past the High School one afternoon last week it was great to see so many kids hard at practice. Four groups were assembled on the fields as the sun beamed down and the buzz of sports was in the air. Good luck to the boys baseball, girls softball, co-ed junior high soccer, and the track team as each of their seasons progress…..
I was still not feeling too well as the week drew to a close and therefore I only managed three beers, a bottle of wine, and a couple of single malts on St. Patrick's Day. It was almost civilized - a far cry from the many 'ugly' scenes from my past. Although I was feeling a little better by the weekend, neither the thought of an evening of socializing in town nor the potential of a Variety Show full of joviality could raise me from The Nest. "What a miserable old bastard", you may be thinking - and you'd be right ! Oh, well, hopefully I'll be back on form next week and able to bring you another enthralling installment of all that I observe from my bird's eye view…..
Until then, be careful out there and stay out of the ditches…..and whatever happens keep preying…….regards, Turkey Vulture…..