#52 - January 4th, 2006

Welcome to the first ‘Bird’s Eye View’ of 2006…How was your New Year’s?...More exciting than mine I would hope. For the one or two of you who may care to know, I stayed in here at The Nest, alone, and nibbled on some lightly squashed squirrel, sipped a little wine, watched my favorite movie, Hitchcock’s ‘The Birds’, and stayed out of harm’s way. By midnight I was eating dead rabbits in my sleep…I was content and felt there was no need for me to mingle with the masses on this particular night…
Nevertheless, I’ve heard from my intrepid team of roving reporters who were ‘on the job’ that night, that many others had a marvelous time at the various ‘do’s’ around the Valley. There was an impromptu gathering at the A.V. Brewery Tasting Room, hosted by the one and only Todd Capuzelo, with party favors for everyone and a top class balloon drop; a Rolling Stones Night at Laurens which was a great success by all accounts; and, of course, at The Boonville Lodge everyone in attendance brought in the New Year with a tipple or two (?)…and perhaps even an occasional Train Wreck (whisky and tequila for heaven’s sake!)…Yes, it would appear that anyone out and about on the town in Boonville had a very festive time to welcome in 2006…”Yer gotta like that”…..
First ‘Wise-ass’ comment of 2006 is this little gem offered by an elderly gentleman in Lemons Market in Philo the other day…”I suppose it’s not a bad thing that this country is at war so often – it’s the only way most of us learn any geography”. Cruel but fair, I’d say…..
From his hideout in Washington State, The Balding Eagle, our Environment Correspondent, files this report via The Onion magazine. It is entitled ‘Raped Environment was asking for it’…
‘In their opening statement before jurors Monday, defense attorneys representing Pacific North Construction & Lumber Corp. argued that their client was not at fault for the July 1997 rape of 30,000 acres of virgin forest, claiming that the forest led the development company on with "an eager and blatant display of its rich, fertile bounty."
"While, obviously, it is extremely unfortunate that this forest was raped, it should have known better than to show off its lush greenery and tall, strong trees in the presence of my client if it didn't want anything to happen," said lead defense attorney Dennis Schickle, speaking before a courtroom packed with members of the media. "It's only natural for any red-blooded American developer to get ideas in its head when it's presented with that kind of untouched beauty."
"The bottom line is," Schickle continued, "if you're going to tease and encourage like that, openly flaunting your abundant natural resources, don't be surprised by the consequences."
"The Pacific North Construction & Lumber Corp. had every reason to believe that that forest wanted it bad," said logger Victor Duffy of Chelan, WA. "Just look at where it was at the time of the incident: It was in a secluded, far-off place, nearly 25 miles from the nearest road. What were those trees doing in that kind of remote spot if they weren't looking for trouble?"
Those siding with the timber company also cite the forest's history, claiming that it has a reputation for being easily exploited.
"Believe me, this is no virgin forest," said Frank Abbate, owner of the Bellingham-based G&H Consolidated Timber. "It may try to pass itself off as pristine and untouched, but I know for a fact that it has a long history of allowing itself to be used by developers."
Russell Belanger, president of the National Timber And Logging Association, agreed. "This forest made it seem like it wanted it, then cried environmental rape when it got it," he said. "At some point, we've got to start asking ourselves who the real victim is in these cases: our nation's promiscuous, manipulative forests, or the good, decent developers out there who are just trying to make an honest living razing the land."…’
Talking of life in the country, I thoroughly recommend A.V.A. contributor Bruce Patterson's book, 'Walking Tractor and Other Tales of Old Anderson Valley'. He's a top-notch writer, unlike some of the pretenders who hang around the top right hand corner of page 7, and he has done a wonderful job with this new work. However, I cannot understand why it's not available at more outlets in the Valley. Come on Bruce, don't be bashful, put it out there 'cos the world needs to know.....
Talking of life in the country, I thoroughly recommend A.V.A. contributor Bruce Patterson's book, 'Walking Tractor and Other Tales of Old Anderson Valley'. He's a top-notch writer, unlike some of the pretenders who hang around the top right hand corner of page 7, and he has done a wonderful job with this new work. However, I cannot understand why it's not available at more outlets in the Valley. Come on Bruce, don't be bashful, put it out there 'cos the world needs to know.....
What about the weather?!?!...With such extremes of wind and rain I know it’s just about the only thing we have all been talking about in and around the Valley this past week. I’m sure many of you are tired of this topic but I still have more one more tidbit to share…I couldn’t believe my eyes on Friday night when a rain-drenched young woman in a skimpy dress walked into the Brewery Tasting Room and…(continued on page 74)…..
Libby’s Mexican Restaurant in Philo is closed; the Boonville Hotel has shut its kitchen temporarily; The Redwood Drive-In is on holiday hours; Lumberjack’s Pizza are on their regular hours which is like holiday hours for the rest of us (good pizza though); and Moya’s Taco stand shockingly closed at 8pm the other night (instead of the normal 10pm). A Turkey Vulture who needs a little more than soggy carrion could go very hungry in these parts at this time of year…It should go without saying that I’m open to any offers to come round for dinner – I am house-trained, you know …..Meanwhile, as Public Service Announcement #42 (printed below for you to cut out and put on the refrigerator door), I offer you the full breakdown of our local eateries’ opening hours for the next month or so…
That’s enough for this week. My brain hurts. May you stay out of the ditches and try to think good thoughts as you negotiate the first few days of the New Year…But first, “Let us prey”, Humbly yours, Turkey Vulture…..
Navarro Store : 7am – 7pm every day.
Floodgate Store : 7am – 5pm Mon-Fri (3pm Tues)…8am – 5pm weekends.
Libby’s Mexican Restaurant : Closed until sometime in February.
Lemons Market : 8am – 7pm Mon-Sat…9am – 6pm Sunday.
Redwood Drive-In : 6am – 3pm Wed-Sun…Closed Mon & Tues. (Gas open 6am – 8pm)
Boontberry Store : 10am – 6pm Mon-Sat.
Lola’s Mexican Restaurant : Re-Opens Friday, Jan 6th…Hours to be announced.
Boonville General Store : 9am – 3pm Thurs-Mon…Closed Tues & Wed.
Boonville Hotel : Kitchen closed - re-opens in Feb… Bar menu 4pm - ? on Fri & Sat
Maggie Mae’s : Opening for coffee at 7.30am until new coffee shop opens*.
Glad’s : Closed. *New place opening in Feb…
The Bar formerly known as The Buckhorn Saloon : To be announced.
Pic ‘n’ Pay : 6am – 11pm Sun-Thurs…6am – Midnight Fri & Sat.
Lumberjack : 4pm – 7pm Sun, Mon, Thur…4pm – 8pm Fri & Sat…Closed Tues & Wed.
Lauren’s Restaurant : 5pm – 9pm Tues-Sat…Closed Sun & Mon.
A.V Market : 7am – 8pm Mon-Fri…8am – 8pm Sat & Sun.
A.V. Brewery Tasting Room : 11am – 6pm Sat-Thurs…11am – 9pm Fri…Closed Tues.