# 85 - November 14th, 2007

Greetings one and all!...Apart from a few rain showers here and there, we seem to be enjoying a quite beautiful fall and that means even curmudgeonly Turkey Vultures like myself are in good moods. I hope you are too…Let’s get the Quiz done first...(answers at the end)…
1.What road joins Hwy 128 at the 18-mile marker?
2. Who is the person that started Navarro Vineyards in the early seventies and still presides over the winery’s operations to this day?
3. After World War 2, immigrants who arrived in The Valley were predominantly from two states. Which ones?
Now on to the Quote of the Week: “Every murderer is probably somebody’s old friend” - Agatha Christie…You gotta like that!...
And now a little ‘Jive Turkey’ just to make your day…We Turkey Vultures are, on average, two and a half feet tall with a wingspan of six feet. Pretty imposing creatures, wouldn’t you say? And you do not want to upset us because if we feel harassed or are disturbed in some way, we will simply throw up on you. It’s as simple as that. Even our youngsters will do this…You have been warned!
Moving on to matters almost as important as the Jive Turkey…It’s The Wine of the Week…Hummingbird knows that the way to a Turkey Vulture’s heart is through his stomach, so last Monday, when I returned to The Nest after an invigorating day of observing you all going about your business in the Valley, she served up a delicious chocolate pie. Not one she had made, I must add, but a “Mrs. Smith’s” pie-in-a-box she had bought at Lemon’s Market in Philo. Not gourmet stuff admittedly but on this occasion it was excellent when devoured with a glass of Port from the Meyer Family Cellars. The winery is a few miles south of Boonville on Hwy 128 and Matt and Karen Meyers, along with their wonderful staff, do a great job with their Port, and their Syrah for that matter. In fact the Port, when served with the right food – and what can be better than chocolate cake? - is almost orgasmic...Yes, I said it, “orgasmic”...Try it and see what happens…
Moving quickly on to The Whine of the Week…When are we going to get another Sheriff in our Valley?? As someone who is out and about more than most in downtown Boonville, I am amazed at the “bad-ass craziness” that is going on at this time. Apart from the twenty-somethings hanging around looking menacing, we have drunks staggering about annoying passers-by with their gibberish, and mischievous young drivers putting the pedal to the metal with careless abandon in the heart of town…Then there are the wine-addled tourists in their ridiculously large R.V.’s, not even bothering to stop when a school bus is unloading, before parking incorrectly in places where parallel parking is not the way it’s done, and then waddling around the shops in their leisure outfits as if they own the place.
Not to mention the weekend “bikers” (those who wear suits and ties from Monday to Friday) in their pristine, ill-fitting leathers, revving their engines so loudly that you cannot hold a conversation within 100 feet of them as they peel out dangerously on to the highway, in a pathetic attempt at being “rebellious”. Hummingbird has a theory that these were the kids at school who were never allowed in to ‘gangs’, or are perhaps they are those who were picked on or bullied. Either way, they are now in a ‘gang’ and milking it for all it’s worth, normally in a tame yet irritating way but one day a serious traffic accident may occur as a result of their posturing. Aaaarrrggghhh! And no cop anywhere to see any of this and give some sense of order!...It’s like the Wild West out there and, though it’s only my humble opinion of course, unless we get another lawman appointed soon then something serious is going to happen…

Talking of lawlessness, how about this for an actual exchange heard in court recently…
Attorney: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
Witness: No.
Attorney: Did you check for blood pressure?
Witness: No.
Attorney: Did you check for breathing?
Witness: No.
Attorney: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
Witness: No.
Attorney: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
Witness: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
After a brief pause, Attorney: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
Witness: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law…

I zoomed down to San Francisco on Sunday and attended the Festival of Remembrance at Grace Cathedral to honor veterans and those who have given their lives in wars so that others can enjoy the freedoms that we have today. It was a wonderful service with poignant words, beautiful hymns, and, at the climax, with the Scottish pipers playing “Amazing Grace”, thousands of poppies (the flower that symbolizes the futility of World War One in particular) were released from the rafters and as they fell on to the congregation of perhaps five hundred people, many were moved to tears.
The ceremony then finished with the reading of The Remembrance from Laurence Binyon’s “For the Fallen”, written in 1924:
“They shall not grow old, as we that are left grow old.
Age shall not whither them, nor the years condemn.
At the going down of the sun, and in the morning,
We will remember them.
To my knowledge, and I have researched this, there is no service to commemorate Veterans’ day in this area. That’s really too bad…

On that note, it’s time to go…The roads are tricky so be careful out there and try to stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; and may your god go with you…Now I must go, but first - let us prey…
Humbly yours…Turkey Vulture (the next “Sheriff” of A.V.? – “You know it makes sense”)…..
You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at
Quiz Answers…
1. That would be Nash Mill Road – or as it is sometimes called, “We get all kinds up here” Way…
2. Ted Bennett - these days very ably assisted by daughter Sarah, amongst many others of course…
3. Arkansas and Oklahoma…To quote Okie Billy Owens when he tells someone he is from Oklahoma and they ask, “Which part?”…He replies, “All of me!”…