# 99 - February 27th, 2008

Greetings one and all…Well it was a miserable weekend of weather in The Valley and beyond, with the torrential rain preventing me from attending the Barn Sale – a pardonable sin, but just barely. Nevertheless, as I basked in the warm afterglow of yet another successful eating performance at the Crab Feed to benefit the Senior Center, my spirits could not be dampened…
It was a very nice event, smaller in terms of numbers and less boisterous as a result of a shorter “social hour” than the Crab Feed of a few weeks ago, but the crab itself was arguably better and the crowd was once again drawn from all walks of life in The Valley resulting in a good time being had by all, I’m sure. Many thanks to Melissa, Eddie, Gina, Buffy, and the other organizers for once again putting on this excellent Valley event…Oh, and a special thanks to the High School J.V. Boys Basketball team who were the waiters on the night and efficiently took care of the special needs that certain Turkey Vultures have at any all-you-can-eat event…
Time to get into this week’s Quiz - answers at the end…
1. Which two businesses are at the junction of Hwy 128 and Farrer Lane in Boonville?
2. What happened to The Boonville Hotel in the late 1920’s?
3. From which vantage point did the first white people to visit these parts initially see Anderson Valley?
Quote of the Week – a classic one this week…”There is only one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about” – the brilliant Oscar Wilde sums up the mindset of a couple of people I know in The Valley…Moving quickly on…
An interesting letter in my fan mail this week came from a long-time reader…”Dear Turkey, Your sign-off-refrain has been bothering me ever since you started writing your column in the AVA….Vultures do not ‘prey’. Prey is what birds of prey do - they catch live animals and kill and eat them. That is what prey means. As you must know, vultures are scavengers - they only eat things they find already dead…Please modify either your sign-off rejoinder or your persona. There is enough ignorance, misinformation and misuse of the language around without your contributing to it. Finally, please forgive this, my rant - it is only meant to help. I do not expect nor require a direct response, but I would appreciate if you would consider this advice…Respectfully, Mike Rosen, Healdsburg, CA…”
In response I would say that, as Mr. Rosen wisely points out, I am very aware that we Vultures are scavengers, although I personally prefer the moniker, "nature's garbage collectors". We do not kill, but I can assure him, and others who may be equally as “bothered”, that we most certainly do prey.
Any decent dictionary would tell you, and Mr. Rosen too if he had taken the time to look before beginning his “rant”, that the verb "to prey" has two distinct meanings. Firstly it means, "to hunt and kill for food" - something we really do not have the time nor inclination to do, and secondly it means, and this is where my use of the word is based, "to take advantage of". In our case this is precisely what we do. We search, with superb eyesight and the best sense of smell possessed by any bird, for situations to take advantage of, such as a squirrel in the road as an appetizer, a dead sheep in the pasture for a special feast, and even drunken tourists in Boonville to ridicule and rebuke…I hope this clears up any confusion…
Let me see, what else has been happening around here?...Well, certainly lots of sexual intercourse (!), as witnessed by the number of newborn babies and small toddlers everywhere you go these days in The Valley. It’s almost as if a bunch of parents got together about two years ago and decided to “make babies” over the ensuing months - “Happy Parenting” to them all. With their remarkable resemblance to Winston Churchill I am fascinated by a baby’s ‘look’ and a gurgling, chuckling little human is a lovely sound, although not quite as wonderful as the squawks of a newly hatched Turkey Vulture in desperate need of fresh carrion, I can assure you…
The Variety show is coming up on the weekend of March 7th and 8th – get your tickets soon, it will almost certainly sell out. Many people put in great efforts to make sure this annual event takes place and it always offers several excellent acts and numerous not-so-excellent ones, most of which are worth seeing anyway. That still leaves a few acts that support my decision, as an experienced Variety show attendee, to not rush to get a seat near the front, as some people would advise you to do. Far better to be near the back and then when, shall we say, a “less interesting” act comes on stage, you can avoid interrupting other’s enjoyment as you step outside for a beer and a chat with like-minded friends. Call me a “curmudgeonly bastard” if you like, but in my humble opinion such name-calling would be unfair. Nevertheless, I wouldn’t bother to argue with you other than to point out that I will be far from alone out there in the parking lot, or “Curmudgeon’s Corner”, as it is fondly called…
That’s all for now…Be careful out there, stay out of the ditches, think good thoughts, and may your god go with you…
Let us prey…Humbly yours, Turkey Vulture…
You can contact me with words of support/abuse by e-mail at
Quiz Answers…
1. The Highpockety Ox and The Zina Hyde Cunningham Winery tasting room…
2. The hotel, originally built in 1864, was moved back 25 feet to accommodate the new highway through the Valley…
3. From ‘Burger Rock’ on what is now the Johnson Ranch alongside the junction of Hwy 253 and Hwy 128 – a wondrous sight it must have been; “ like a garden of Eden” according to those first settlers, the Beeson brothers and William Anderson…