# 152 - March 11th, 2009

Greetings one and all…Are you sitting comfortably - then I shall begin… Did you enjoy The Variety Show last weekend? I certainly did and will give a brief ‘review’ below. In the meantime I would like to respond to the rampant rumor running around the Valley’s theatrical and fashion circles that Captain Rainbow would be wearing a new tuxedo at the Show this year. Not true - it was the same one as usual. It didn’t matter – he looked very dapper and did a marvelous job once again, although I must say I was concentrating more on watching his attractive co-host, Patty Liddy, who was far more voluptuous and has much better legs than the Captain...
And, with no connection whatsoever to the aforementioned delightful co-host (?), we now move to The Quote of the Week, which features some words to live by from the immortal Mae West...”When I’m good I’m very good, but when I’m bad I’m better”...As I’ve said before – “yer gotta like that”...
I arrived at the Variety Show just before 7pm on Friday as the show was about to begin. “We’re at the legal limit. You’re the last one in, Vulture,” Back Stage Maestro and Trouble-Shooter Tom Smith announced as he closed the door behind me. I stood by the door at the very back – the perfect position from which to ‘escape’ to the important ‘discussions over drinks’ which I planned to be involved with in the parking lot at various times throughout the evening along with the usual suspects. It was not to be. I was soon enlisted as the unofficial doorman preventing latecomers from entering, as insisted upon by Fire Chief Colin Wilson. As a result I missed the ‘discussions’ and for the first time in years saw every single act in what turned out to be a very good line-up. In the first half my particular favorites were Olivia Allen’s opening ‘Napoleon Dynamite’ quirky dance routine; the fun-filled ‘Young at Heart’ dance troop led by Linda Boudoures; the majestic ballet from ‘Sleeping Beauty’ by Morgan, the hip Mendo Dance Project from Elk, and Sarah Larkin’s delightful singing... Following the interval, during which time the ‘discussions’ outside had been heavy and intense, the second half maintained the standards set earlier and was also full of good acts, with perhaps the evening’s highlight being The Bronettes and their saucy rendition of a musical commercial for the hippy soap they apparently used to wash themselves all over with – the mind boggled. The show finished with Amanda Grace hanging from, and gyrating amongst, ‘scarves’ attached to the ceiling. She was very talented and extremely easy on the eye, I must say.....On Saturday evening, I arrived earlier and took up my position on the door. The ticket holders were allowed in first to prevent some of the awkward moments of the night before when such people arrived late and had to be turned away, with full refund of course, because the capacity had been reached – there were over 400 people there each night...Once again the quality of performances was high with my favorites being the melodious A.V. Chorus, the wonderfully talented Holly Newstead and her inspiring music and dance performance in sign language, Kim Morgan’s heart-rending song and beautiful voice, the song, dance, and flamenco guitar of Susan and Eli, the piano playing of Doctor Jack Powers (particularly the piece by Chopin), and the excellent closing number featuring the exotic and very tight middle eastern dancing of The Trillium Tribe. There were very few ‘questionable’ acts on either night and the wonderful efforts by all, both on stage and off, should be highly commended. I should add that the general consensus at the ‘Afterglow Party’ held at Lauren’s Restaurant in Boonville following the Saturday night Show was that Variety Show #18 would go down as one of the very best of all-time!!!
Talking of good times, this coming Saturday sees the St. Patrick’s Day Dinner at the Apple Hall in Boonville. This event benefits the A.V. Senior Center ($15 adults/$8 Under 8’s) and with Happy Hour starting at 5.30 and dinner served at 6pm, it should be yet another most enjoyable community night out in the Valley. For further details contact Gina at 895-3609...
Turning to another possibly enjoyable event, albeit some way away from the Valley, modesty has probably prevented the A.V.A. Supremo Bruce Anderson from mentioning his appearance at this coming weekend’s Anarchist Book Faire in S.F. It takes place at the County Fair Building (alongside G.G. Park at 9th Avenue on Lincoln Way) from 10am to 6pm on Saturday and Sunday, March 14th/15th, with Bruce scheduled to speak at 11.30 on Saturday morning. So, if you’re in the area, say “Hi”, give him a quick rendition of “We’ll keep the red flag flying here”, and maybe he’ll buy you a drink at The Blackthorn Tavern just across the street. I’m sure he won’t be against having a few shots of Jameson’s himself - just to get through being an anarchist for a few hours...
This time The Wine of the Week comes about as a result of the previously mentioned unofficial doorman job at the Variety Show. The performance of this duty was severely tested by the constant flow of mid-teens in and out of the exit doors, cell phones clasped in their hands, and ‘important’ messages to send and receive no doubt. What a pain. Some of them left and returned several times in each half of the show and by the end I was telling them they’d have to wait for the intervals between acts to return. They didn’t like this but with the enjoyment of other guests being impaired by the constant opening of the doors it was not difficult to justify. I’d forgotten how annoying, surly, and self-indulgent some kids of that age can be and in my day they would have been the recipients of a little clip round the ear for their behavior...Perhaps having a curmudgeonly Turkey Vulture on the door is not something the Show will require next year but I will be there if called upon, ready to ‘clip’ whenever necessary...
On a far more enjoyable topic let’s move to the Whine of the Week. Following the Show I attended the Afterglow Party at Lauren’s and enjoyed a glass of Pinot Noir from Navarro Vineyards accompanied by a pepperoni and mushroom pizza served by the very able Terry Ryder, helping out behind the bar on such a busy night. It was a delicious pairing and, whilst the word ‘orgasmic’ did not come to mind, the phrase ‘yer gotta like that’ certainly did – for the second time in a week too!
I should go now – I’ve got to see a man about a sheep...Be careful out there; think good thoughts; and may your god go with you...Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”…
Humbly yours, Turkey Vulture...
You can contact me with words of support/abuse by e-mail at turkeyvulture1 @ earthlink.net