# 400 - April 2nd, 2014
Greetings
one and all – if you are sitting comfortably then I shall begin… Yes, readers,
it’s the 400th edition of ‘Bird’s Eye View by Turkey Vulture’ and as
you can see by the photograph I don’t look a day over 399!!! To celebrate this
auspicious occasion, not only am I expecting a letter from the President (of
the Independent Career Women (I.C.W.) of Anderson Valley) but also I am pleased
to share with you this poignant ode, by D. Bottoms, to Turkey Vultures
everywhere…
We have all seen them circling pastures,
Have looked up from the mouth of a barn, a pine
clearing,
The fences of our own backyards, and have
stood
Amazed by the one slow wing beat, the endless
dihedral drift.
But I had never seen so many so close,
hundreds,
Every limb of the dead oak feathered
black,
and I cut the engine,
Let the river grab the jon boat and pull it toward
the tree.
The black leaves shined, the pink fruit
blossomed
Red, ugly as a human heart.
Then, as I passed under their dream, I saw for the
first time
Its soft countenance, the raw fleshy jowls
Wrinkled and generous, like the faces of the very old
Who have grown to empathize with everything.
And I drifted away from them, slow, on the pull of
the river,
Reluctant, looking back at their
roost,
Calling them what I'd never called them, what they
are,
Those dwarfed transfiguring angels,
Who flock to the side of the poisoned fox,
The mud turtle
crushed on the shoulder of the road,
Who pray over the leaf-graves of the anonymous lost,
With mercy enough to consume us all and give us
wings.
It’s
all right - I cried too… And to complete this special occasion’s words of
wisdom, here are a couple of things for you to digest…
As
I’ve said many times, despite what you may think, it’s not all glamour being a
Turkey Vulture but we do get many compliments. My favorite comes from no less
an ‘expert’ than Charles Darwin who said about us Turkey Vultures, “A
disgusting bird whose bald scarlet head is formed to wallow in putridity” - thank,
you Charles, how kind… And furthermore, try to remember – we Turkey Vultures
are Nature’s Garbage Collectors - an honorable profession, even if I do say so
myself… So even if some folks say nasty things about us we know that sticks and
stones can break our bones but words can never hurt us – unless of course
somebody hits me with a really heavy, hardcover dictionary…
Hard
to believe but there is an even more significant Valley event than the 400th column that has been celebrated this week - that would be the birthday of Freda
Fox. The Valley’s oldest resident was born on 26th March 1918 and
that makes her 96-years young… She once shared with me this piece of advice,
written on a card hanging in her kitchen, that she that has tried to follow - “Accept
the things you cannot change, have the courage to change the things you can,
and possess the wisdom to know the difference”’… Wise words from a wonderfully
wise woman and I’m sure we all wish her ‘Many Happy Returns!’…
Public
Service Announcements (P.S.A.’s)… Calendars and pens at the ready… #683 - This
is a last minute item so hopefully you see it in time - The Agriculture Science
class at Anderson Valley High School is going to be raising laying pullets for
sale. If you are interested please contact teacher Beth Swehla today, April
2nd. The price per bird will be determined after they know the size of
the order. It will not be over $10 per bird. Possible varieties available
to order: Naked Neck, Black Australorp, Rhode Island Red, Black Sex Link, Barred
Rock, Silver Laced Wyandotte, Buff Orpington, and Americana. Call Beth in her
classroom at the high school at 895-2514… #684 - If you wish to check out the
Cloverdale Fiddle Festival, Saturday, April 5 then the Senior
Center is organizing a bus trip there and back. $20.00 covers transport and the
festival. If interested contact the Senior Center at 895-3609 or the bus at
489-1175… #685 - The Barn Sale returns this weekend for its usual spring,
summer, and fall run after a four-month hiatus. This takes place at The St.
Elizabeth Seton Catholic Church Refectory on A.V. Way just north of Boonville
from 9am to 3pm on both Saturday and Sunday, April 5 and 6… #686 - The
Mendocino Bookmobile is in town next Tuesday, April 8. They are in the Valley
on alternate Tuesdays for 45 minutes at each of these places and times: Navarro
Store 9am; (then off to Comptche); back to the Valley at Floodgate 12.30pm;
Philo 1.30pm; Boonville (Apple Hall) 2.30pm. Their next visit will be Tuesday,
April 22. Phone 463-4694 for further details… #687 - The Vets from the
Mendocino Animal Hospital will be making two visits to the Valley this month.
Those will be Thursdays, April 10 and 24 and as always the venue and times are
the A.V. Farm Supply from 2pm-3.30pm…
Moving
quickly on to a few of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week
at The Three-Dot Lounge – yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant
(and surprisingly reliable) Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the
Valley where people get together and share their thoughts about life in A.V.…
… Gloria Ross, Mike Brendlen, Kristy Kramer, Bill
Sterling, Anne-Marie and ‘Junior’ Mendoza at the Farm Supply, and Anne
Fashauer… Just a few of the local folks who, for me, made last Tuesday a very
pleasant day in the Valley…
… Bruce McEwen, my #1 fan and yet a good man, wrote a
letter to the newspaper last week soliciting my assistance in finding out the
lowest point on Highway 253 between Boonville and Ukiah. Well, Bruce, after
extensive research I can inform you that the answer is Anderson Creek, at the
bridge as you leave Boonville and start ‘heading over the hill.’ When the
highway reaches Ukiah it is at a much higher elevation, even at Robinson Creek.
Ukiah’s altitude, the one in which you spend most of your working week,
probably explains your headaches, confusion, and general disorientation - not
unlike that experienced by a climber on Everest, or a very inebriated person on
a swing…
… The Community Alliance Newsletter, produced every
quarter thanks to the efforts of Suzy Miller (and Jimmy Humble) will be missed
by many now that they have ‘retired.’ This information sheet, with its list of
Valley events, meetings, organizations, and services, was a very useful
community tool, and one has to hope that somebody will volunteer to carry it
on…
… Oops, I forgot - unless I am mistaken as to some of
their primary functions, isn’t this a good fit for our Chamber of Commerce?
Certainly the events section of that Newsletter would seem to be. The Chamber’s
Events page is certainly in need of some sort of boost, featuring, as it does,
the regular Grange functions, the Farmers’ Market, an occasional Valley
gathering, and little else. The Valley’s social calendar is extensive and many
of the goings-on could be included so that the loss of the Newsletter would be
somewhat offset… I’m just sayin’…
… What’s all the fuss about? Self-ies / Us-ies - those
photographs taken by ourselves, of ourselves with friends, are all the rage and
discussed as if the wheel has been re-discovered. Some of us have been taking
these for 40+ years - we just didn’t know the name of what it was we were
doing!...
This
week our 3-Dot regular, The Old Buzzard, will not be presenting his insightful
series – ‘Signs that the Apocalypse is Approaching’ - as he is undercover on
assignment. There is no truth whatsoever to the rumor that he and his cohorts
are attempting to sabotage a frost protection fan or two. I couldn’t possibly
say any more than perhaps they are simply studying the night sky and,
coincidentally, they have found a good spot to do this among the vines at
Golden Buttocks’ vineyard in the Floodgate area…
I’m
outta here - I’ve got see a man about a sheep… So, until we talk again – ‘Keep
the Faith’; be careful out there; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts;
relax in the knowledge that the hare has returned safely to his burrow; and may
your god go with you… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”…
Humbly yours, Turkey Vulture
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse
either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at <turkeyvulture1@earthlink.net>
p.p.s. On the sheep, Grace…
p.p.p.s. Hi, Silver Swan – behaving yourself? Hopefully
not!
p.p.p.p.s. Bobwhite Quail - keep up the knitting!
posted by Turkey Vulture @ 10:40 AM
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