# 404 - April 30th, 2014

Greetings one and all – if you are sitting comfortably then I shall begin… I like the newspaper’s new format and although it may initially mean a little more work for the Major, in the future it will actually give him plenty of opportunity to do Mr. Anderson’s laundry in the morning and then have lots of time to make sandwiches and pots of tea for The Supreme Commander later in the afternoon. For his part, I imagine our mighty leader will be able to grab more naps and listen to ‘Democracy Now’ and his other favorite KZYX & Z programs for hours on end… Let’s be moving on…

       Public Service Announcements (P.S.A.’s)… Calendars and pens at the ready… #685 - The monthly Barn Sale takes place this coming weekend at The St. Elizabeth Seton Catholic Church Refectory on A.V. Way, just north of Boonville from 9am to 3pm on both Saturday and Sunday, May 3 and 4… #686 - The A.V. Theatre Guild’s ‘Comedy of the Arts and More’ - a comic opera, will be presented at The Grange from Thursday thru’ Saturday, May 1-3 at 7pm, plus a matinee performance at 2pm on Sunday May 4… #687 - If anyone is interested in one or both of the following fun trips please contact Gina at the Senior Center 895-3609 or the Bus driver Tamara 489-1175: first it’s the aforementioned AV Theater Guild Performance on Sunday, May 4 - cost for bus and admission is $9 for Seniors; and then on Friday, May 9, there will be a trip to the Botanical Gardens and lunch at the new Café at Fort Bragg Botanical Gardens. Leaving Boonville at 10am - cost for bus and lunch is $5; admission to the Gardens is free… #688 - The Boonville Farmer’s Market moves across the street from its winter home at The General Store to its regular summertime spot in the Boonville Hotel parking lot beginning Saturday, May 3, from 10am-12.30pm… #689 - The annual Boonville Beer Festival is at The Fairgrounds on Saturday, May 3, from 1pm-5pm. This is not a non-alcohol event so children will not be allowed to see some adults behaving like children… #690 - Work off your hangover from the BeerFest at The Boontling Classic, a 5K footrace the following morning - Sunday, May 4. Call 895-2701 for details… #691 - The Mendocino Bookmobile is in town next Tuesday, May 6. They are in the Valley on alternate Tuesdays for 45 minutes at each of these places and times: Navarro Store 9am (before heading off to Comptche for an hour or two); the Floodgate 12.30pm; Philo 1.30pm; Boonville (Apple Hall) 2.30pm. Their next visit will be Tuesday, May 20. Phone 463-4694 for further details…  #692 - The A.V. High School’s Ag. Department will hold its plant sale, featuring vegetable and flower seedlings, on Saturday, May 10 from 9am-Noon at the high school - please bring your own flat or box to carry your purchases home... And their spring Drive Thru’ Dinner will be on May 22 - details to follow… #693 - Coq au Vin, offering delicious French country-style food at its location at The Floodgate, will begin its summer schedule on Thursday, May 15. That means local nights featuring a special menu and prices on Thursdays and Mondays, with the regular menu offered on Friday, Saturday, and Sunday… #694 - The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital will be making two visits to the Valley in May. Those will be Thursdays May 8 and 22, and as always the venue and times are the A.V. Farm Supply from 2pm-3.30pm…

      

       As a bonus P.S.A. here is the menu for the Community lunches over the next week at the Senior Center at the Veterans Hall in Boonville… The Center asks for a $6 donation from Seniors and charges $7 for Non-Seniors… Tomorrow, Thursday, May 1, the lunch, always served by Marti Titus and her crew at 12.15pm, will be Meatloaf, Mashed Potatoes w/ Gravy, Carrots, Rolls, Barley Salad,
and Birthday Cup Cakes for dessert … Then next Tuesday, May 6, the menu will feature Tamale Loaf, Cauliflower, Salsa, Black Beans, Freekah Salad, and Kahlua Cake for dessert... Remember, all ages are welcome!... Hope to see you there…

       Moving quickly on to a few of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge – yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant (and surprisingly reliable) Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley, a location that sees people get together and share their thoughts about life in A.V. and where we subscribe to the Winston Churchill philosophy that “A lie will get halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to put on its pants”… So I’ll put my pants on and continue… I have attended a few excellent Valley events of late and some regulars at the Three-Dot thought I should mention them, so here we go…

…The Lion’s Club Easter Breakfast and Egg Hunt was very well-attended and, as always with this group, the event was an unqualified success, not least because I was given extra ham and eggs as I am allergic to pancakes, particular if it means I can get extra ham and eggs… The eggs this year were particularly good - thanks to Bob the Whisker working under the master tutelage of Judy Long… I did not stick around for the egg hunt but hopefully it was a success and hopefully everyone appreciated all the work that goes in to organizing such an event by the always hard-working Lions…

… Two other events I managed to attend, both last Sunday afternoon, were the A.V. Unity Club’s Wild Flower Show at the Fairgrounds that led nicely into the A.V. Arts Fundraiser, an event that has not happened for several years and was resurrected this year to raise money for art in the schools. Both were very enjoyable and hopefully raised lots of money, although neither seemed as busy as I remember them being in the past. When also considering other recent Valley events, it appears that the Valley is taking its time ‘waking up’ from its winter slumbers. Come on folks - wakey, wakey!... It’s time to once again to get out and support your local good causes and small businesses - you know it makes sense…  

… Hands up if in the last week or two you have heard the phrase ‘ - but he/she is so nice’, when someone is trying to explain away a person’s failure to do what they said they were going to do, or perhaps they did it so poorly that it would have been better to have had someone else do it, or even oneself… Hmmm, interesting - that’s quite a lot of hands… Saying they are ‘nice’ should not be an excuse for incompetence or lack of accountability, and whether they are ‘nice’ or not, and they often are of course, is inconsequential. It is not a big deal in the overall scheme of things but one does seem to hear the phrase used in this situation on a far too regular basis and several regulars are getting a little annoyed at it… Just thought you should know…

… Conversely, a phrase you do not hear very often, if at all, is, ‘Even Homer nods’, a Latin phrase, used by myself on occasion but otherwise heard very infrequently these days. It is used when remarking that even the best of us make mistakes and it refers to the man revered as the greatest of ancient Greek epic poets, who apparently rarely did anything incorrectly or poorly… To my point - I called Scharffenberger Cellars and was told by the answering machine that they would be closed on Tuesday and Wednesday, March 18 and 19, but would re-open for business on Thursday. This was good to know - except I was calling on April 24! I had to chuckle at the oversight by such a professional organization, and it naturally led me to utter, ‘Even Homer nods’…

… From our 3-Dot regular, The Old Buzzard, comes another in his insightful series – ‘Signs that the Apocalypse is Approaching’… Buzzard reports, “Following my report last week stating, in a nutshell, that ‘Vegetarian diets are tied to generally poorer health, poorer quality of life and a higher need for health care than their meat-eating counterpart, and specifically carry elevated risks of cancer, allergies, and mental health disorders’, several veggie friends of mine have expressed mild rebuke. They are entitled to do so of course, and in most cases I am almost certain it was not as a result of some sort of mental health issue. One such fellow, the venerable Benjamin Graham, MD has responded ‘in regard to the vegetarian study: dietary studies are difficult to do in that most of them--like this one--are self reported. Who knows what the subjects are actually eating. However the biggest concern is that it does not address cause and effect. Many turn to vegetarian diets because of pre-existing ill health in the hope that it will improve their situation. (e.g. Bill Clinton, who went from Big Macs prior to his heart attacks to vegan.)’… Thanks for your input, good doctor. My concern is not so much that the veggie folks do what they do, but rather that some of them do so with an air of superiority, almost frowning at us hamburger guzzlers. This is odd but, given that the study has convinced me that vegetarians generally are more likely to suffer from mental health disorders than the steak-munchers among us, perhaps I should not be surprised…”

       Thank you for your comment, Buzzard - I find it equally as ‘odd’ that a doctor reads your weekly ramblings… Well now I think it’s time to take my leave - I’ve got see a man about a sheep… So, until we talk again – ‘Keep the Faith’; be careful out there; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; and may your god go with you… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”…

       Humbly yours, Turkey Vulture - extremely honored to have the 2^nd tallest tree (343.6 feet) in Hendy Woods named after me ……

p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at <turkeyvulture1@earthlink.net>

p.p.s. On the sheep, Grace…

p.p.p.s. Keep on humming, Hummingbird…

p.p.p.p.s. Still miss you Frank and Bing…