# 273 - Aug 24th, 2011

Greetings one and all - if you are sitting comfortably then I shall begin... Coming up on the ballot in November will be the election of new school board members and there are already some very interesting developments as new candidates have now been announced. I have tried to find out exactly who is running and hopefully this information is correct. Up for re-election is long-standing President, Marty Bradford, along with Dick Browning, a board member for a number of years also, who apparently had planned to step down but has now decided to return. Two new candidates will be Ben Anderson, school baseball coach and A.V. graduate (class of 1990), and Ernie Pardini, class of 1972, Anderson Valley born and bred, and from a family who came here many, many decades ago. Hopefully I will find out more soon, but it would appear that with Grace Espinoza resigning, three of these four candidates will be joining Erica Lemons and Ydira Mendoza on a board that will have some very significant decisions to make over the next couple of years...
With this in mind, there is obviously going to be a period of serious debate and conflicting views in the Valley over the next couple of months. It also means that you can expect a few relevant Quotes of the Week to hopefully enjoy as we experience the wonderful democratic process in action. This week we start off with this basic premise from the American critic and magazine editor, George Jean Nathan (1882-1958) who said, “Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.” Yes folks, get registered and make a difference...
Public Service Announcements…#305 – Tomorrow, Thursday, Aug 25th, sees the vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital coming to the Valley for their monthly visit. This will be at the A.V. Farm Supply on Hwy 128 north of Philo from 2pm to 3.30pm. If your pet has shots due, or for most of your animal’s needs, this provides a great convenience for pet owners in the Valley that deserves your support, as does the Farm Supply which provides this invaluable service. And please note – due to the shortage of vets, there will be no vet visit in September!... #306 – The 2nd Guest Chef Dinner to benefit the Senior Center will take place this Friday, Aug 26th, when chef Diana Charles will be serving a traditional Italian dinner, featuring Chicken marsala, followed by a blackberry cobbler dessert and a complimentary glass of wine. Dinner is served at 7pm and seating will be limited to sixty guests. Beer and wine will be available and tickets, which sold out for last month’s event, are selling fast, so call the Senior Center (895-3609) for further details or get your tickets from Laughing Dog Books in Boonville... #307 - It’s the final weekend of the month so that means it’s time for another Barn Sale. As always, it takes place at The St. Elizabeth Seton Catholic Church Refectory on A.V. Way just north of Boonville, from 9am to 3pm on both Saturday and Sunday, Aug 27th/28th...
Moving quickly on to a few of the topics under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge - yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley - where people gather and share their thoughts about Valley life...
... In light of the upcoming election, perhaps I should not have been surprised to receive a request to place some flyers in The 3-Dot’s front window endorsing one of the tickets. Look out for the “Bernie Andini for School Board – We care because we were there!” posters to appear soon!...
... A couple of regulars were at Lauren’s Restaurant last week to check out the General Knowledge and Trivia Quiz held every Thursday evening. They informed us that The Major – the A.V.A.’s own Mark Scaramella, won for the second consecutive week when this shameless ‘quiz mercenary’ signed on with well-traveled Brit, Jeff Thomas, and a team of young interns from the Boonville Hotel to form a very strong, multi-generational team that won on a tie-break question over The LURJ (Lee, Ursula, Rob, Judy)... The quiz-goers also raved about the superb Pulled Pork sandwich, served with corn on the cob and Lauren’s delicious fries... Sounds like the perfect evening for groupies of the Major and admirers of a summer sandwich classic...
... “Young” George Gowan popped his head in at The 3-Dot on Sunday and said he no longer wanted his name to appear in the paper. I believe I made this ‘mistake’ over two years ago, but he can rest assured I will not do it again...
... It would appear that the Friday evening happy hour scene has taken off at The Buckhorn, Boonville, based on the reports of regulars who were in attendance as a large crowd of revelers ate and drank heartily there last week... The bar was packed, and the beer garden heaving; there was even a crowd of schoolteachers from our local high school in attendance... This was something of a surprise to some – particular those, including many school students, who were at a loss to explain why none of their teachers were in attendance at the high school fall sports’ fundraiser the following evening at the Grange... I have to wonder too – why was that?...
... Finally from The 3-Dot this week, it’s a few words from our 3-Dot regular, The Old Buzzard, in his insightful series - ‘Forget The Rapture and worry about The Approach of the Apocalypse’... Buzzard reports, “For some spurious reasons, this year there has been no County Fair Booklet distributed for this year’s event – this is the reference book-sized publication containing the details/rules for all of the various categories of events/crafts/livestock/etc that are included in the Fair for competition, plus the accompanying entrance forms. People have been quite upset by this situation, particularly now that many have missed the deadline (Friday Aug 19th) to enter their exhibit. I asked around and the ‘broken printer’ explanation just does not suffice. So once again it is like pulling teeth to get a satisfactory explanation to the kind of odd Valley conundrum that we often seem to experience...
Oh, dear, have I upset somebody? Surely not? Oh, well, I guess I’ll get my coat and leave... Anyway, before I go, with the hot weather still with us, please remember to keep your windows cracked if you have pets in your vehicle; children too, I suppose. Otherwise, ‘Keep the Faith’; be careful out there; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; and may your god go with you… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Humbly yours, Turkey Vulture...
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at
p.p.s. On the sheep, Grace...

# 272 - Aug 17th, 2011

Greetings one and all - if you are sitting comfortably then I shall begin... “I was stuck in traffic in Philo” is an unheard phrase in these parts but it was the ‘talk of the town’ for most of last week and the frustrations for some are not over yet as the resurfacing of Hwy 128 continues. I’m sure everyone has by now shared their own tale of woe and there is little I can add. I am told that it will not end soon with more work continuing north west to Mill Creek near to Clark Road, and then the long section from the C.D.F. station, south of Boonville, to the Sonoma County Line surely which is surely going to be a major headache for some. However, according to my sources, the road between Boonville and the Indian Creek Bridge just outside Philo is NOT being resurfaced at this time, although a few temporary fixes have been made along this section so negotiating those few miles of serious pothole-dodging has been lessened somewhat. Meanwhile, many people have complained about the long delays, often over 30 minutes at a time, and some question why the work isn’t being done in the middle of the night. I say ‘come on, get over it!’ As someone who has repeatedly complained about the rapid decline in the condition of Hwy 1287 over the past year, I must now say that the job is being completed in record time, by a private (profit-making) company using two shifts a day, and they are doing a splendid job. Sure, it’s a little annoying at times, but the end result will be well worth it in terms of the decrease in wear and tear on your vehicles and the new, wonderfully smooth drive along the Valley floor. Dare I say, in comparison to how the road was before, driving along it now is almost orgasmic...
Talking of which, here is your Quote of the Week, which for the first time mentions the word ‘orgasm’! It’s from American comic genius (in my opinion), George Carlin - “The most unfair thing about life is the way it ends. I mean, life is tough. It takes up a lot of your time. What do you get at the end of it? A Death! What's that, a bonus? I think the life cycle is all backwards. You should die first; get it out of the way. Then you live in an old age home. You get kicked out when you're too young, you get a gold watch, you go to work. You work forty years until you're young enough to enjoy your retirement. You do drugs, alcohol, you party, you get ready for high school. You go to grade school, you become a kid, you play, you have no responsibilities, you become a little baby, you go back into the womb, you spend your last nine months gently floating around...and then you finish off as an orgasm”.... Wow - yer gotta like that!...
Public Service Announcements… #304 – This Saturday, August 20th, is the 2nd Annual Fundraiser for High School Fall Sports – Soccer, Football, Cheerleading, and Volleyball. It is at The Grange at 7pm, following the High School Alumni Soccer tournament that takes place from noon to 5pm that day at Tom Smith Field, next to the high school. The fundraising event requests a $10 donation that will get you into an evening featuring a $5 Mexican dinner, $3 beer and wine, and the d.j. sounds of Alex Favella – I hope to see you there. Tickets are available at Lemons Market in Philo and All that Good Stuff in Boonville, or on the door at The Grange on the night... #305 – Next week sees the return to the Valley of the vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital for their monthly visit. This will be on Thursday Aug 25th at the A.V. Farm Supply on Hwy 128 north of Philo from 2pm to 3.30pm. If your pet has shots due and for most of your animal’s needs, this is an invaluable service to the Valley that deserves your support... #306 – The 2nd Guest Chef Dinner to benefit the Senior Center will take place on the last Friday of the month, Aug 26th, when chef Diana Charles will be serving a traditional Italian dinner, featuring Chicken marsala, followed by a blackberry cobbler dessert and a complimentary glass of wine. Dinner is served at 7pm and seating will be limited to sixty guests. Beer and wine will be available and tickets, which sold out for last month’s event, are selling fast, so call the Senior Center (895-3609) for further details or get your tickets from Laughing Dog Books in Boonville...
Talk of the cheerleaders being one of the school teams to benefit from this weekend’s benefit at the Grange leads me to comment about the fine job these girls, led by coach Kerri Sanchez and Grandma Joy, did at their car wash fundraiser last week. They toiled away from noon to 6pm and business was very brisk, with many satisfied customers leaving healthy tips for a job well done. This group of sixteen girls has been, to be frank, neglected by the school in some ways but hopefully with this weekend’s fundraiser and their continued hard work at other events – waiting tables at crab feeds and St Patrick’s Day functions, they will get the recognition they deserve and funds will be found every year to help maintain these girl’s chosen sport at A.V. High...
Well if this past weekend wasn’t the ‘Mother of All’ party weekends, I don’t know what was! As I zoomed around the Valley on Saturday afternoon I barely had time to stop and eat the dead skunk on the road by Handley Cellars... My first stop was at Robert and Nicola Anderson-Miner’s lovely home up in Bell Valley where they threw a small and impromptu, but absolutely delightful pool party. With Robert behind the poolside bar producing some of the finest daiquiri’s west of the El Floridita Bar in Havana, Cuba, and delicious carnitas tacos with all the fixings served up continuously all afternoon, this was ‘Vulture-heaven’. It was all Hummingbird could do to persuade me to leave but we had made arrangements so, after my fifth taco, off we flew...
We had plans to attend the Airport Party in Boonville but time had flown by and it was 5pm so we had to pass on that, although I heard it was a big success once again, with over one hundred airplane rides over the Valley given to folks in attendance. Avoiding the air traffic, we flew on by and headed towards the Deep End where we reached the big party event on Gschwend Road to celebrate Elaine Busse’s birthday. It was a very eclectic Valley crowd of perhaps 120 people who had gathered at the Busse home. Again it was alongside a swimming pool - too bad Turkey Vultures can’t swim – and there was abundant wine and a splendid feast served up by Corey Morse and Diana Charles, who capped it off with ice cream in cones – simple, yet brilliant! The glitterati came from many Valley ‘walks of life’ – school employees, winery tasting room staff, artists, carpenters, craftspeople, retired folks, twenty-something’s, small-business owners, even a couple of brightlighters up for the weekend from the Bay Area (who always seem to get a little more tipsy/loud than the locals). It was a proper party, not a pot luck, thrown by Elaine and husband Buzz (Dennis), and as I staggered out of there many people were still around, being treated to some fine live music by Elaine’s son Travis and his band...
Finally, the next morning, following a delicious chicken fried steak and eggs brunch at The Buckhorn, I basically crashed out and was unable to attend the Lions Club BBQ fundraiser at the Fairgrounds for the A.V. Volunteer Ambulance service. Hummingbird did go however and said that attendance was down on previous years. To some, this may be surprising for an August weekend, despite the other festivities I have mentioned. Unfortunately, it is perhaps a sign of the economic climate, which seems to me to be increasingly affecting us here in the Valley as each month passes and our tourist visitors and their dollars appear to be in relatively short supply...
Well now I think it’s time to take my leave... With the hot weather still around, please remember to keep your windows cracked if you have pets in your vehicle; children too I suppose... Otherwise, ‘Keep the Faith’; be careful out there; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; and may your god go with you… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Humbly yours, Turkey Vulture...
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at
p.p.s. Hi, Silver Swan – behaving yourself? Hopefully not!

# 271 - Aug 10th, 2011

Greetings one and all - if you are sitting comfortably then I shall begin... I had a nice little chat last week with Valley folks, Ross and Joyce Murray, as they enjoyed dinner at Lauren’s Restaurant in Boonville. Ross, who turns 93 later this year, is still sprightly of mind and working on KZYX & Z local radio. He informed me that he and Joyce had met on the set of the Carol Burnett Show in the early seventies. Prior to that, Joyce had not only performed with the Andrews Sisters but with many other of the greats from that era too, including Nat King Cole, Rosemary Clooney, Ella Fitzgerald, Robert Goulet, and many times with Perry Como on his show, on which she appeared for three years, live every Saturday evening. “I am glad I married her,” said Ross, with a glint in his eye. “We just received a $600 residual check from one of her singing performances with Perry Como that recently aired on television!”...
Ross clearly thinks the world of Joyce and the feelings are no doubt mutual. With that in mind, here are a few positive comments on marriage for your Quote(s) of the Week... “A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person” – from American journalist and author Mignon McLaughlin... And from relationship psychologist George Levinger – “What counts in making a happy marriage is not so much how compatible you are, but how you deal with incompatibility”... Legendary French movie actress Simone Signoret said, “Chains do not hold a marriage together. It is threads, hundreds of tiny threads which sew people together through the years”... How about this from American journalist and novelist, Anne Taylor Fleming – “A long marriage is two people successfully trying to dance a duet and two solos at the same time”... And of course we have to have some comedic and less favorable views of marriage from a couple of infamous divorcées... First Woody Allen, who said, “Basically my wife was very immature. I'd be at home in the bath and she'd just walk in and sink all of my boats”... And finally, from Groucho Marx – “Marriage is a wonderful institution, but who wants to live in an institution?”...
Moving on... Public Service Announcements…#303 – The Airport Party is here. It’s this Saturday, August 13th, starting at noon at the airport in Boonville, and will feature rides over the Valley and a party for one and all, followed by a community pot luck at 5pm... #304 – This coming Sunday, August 14th, is the annual Lions Club BBQ to benefit the A.V. Volunteer Ambulance. Service. It’s at The Fairgrounds from 4.30pm to 7.30pm and is certainly one for your calendars, I’d suggest... #305 – And finally this week, coming soon is the 2nd Annual Fundraiser for High School Fall Sports – Soccer, Football, Cheerleading, and Volleyball. It is at The Grange on Saturday, Aug 20th, following the High School Alumni Soccer tournament that takes place from noon to 5pm that day at Tom Smith Field, next to the high school. The fundraising event requests a $10 donation that will get you into an evening featuring a $5 Mexican dinner, $3 beer and wine, and the d.j. sounds of Alex Favella – hope to see you there. Tickets available at Lemons Market in Philo and All that Good Stuff in Boonville, or on the door at The Grange on the 20th...
Moving quickly on to a couple of the topics under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge - yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley where people gather and share their thoughts about Valley life...
... The Red-Headed Warbler and his family arrived in town at the weekend for a few days and after a guzzling down a few beers and devouring vast amounts of baby back pork ribs at The 3-Dot they zoomed down to the live music scene at the Navarro Store. They were part of an audience of close to five hundred people that was thoroughly entertained and amazed by the wonderful blues/harp sounds of the legendary Charlie Musselwhite and his band. Dave Evans and his Navarro Store Crew pulled off the event expertly and it made for a very special Valley night out... Up next week it’s the always-popular ‘House of Floyd’ – the Pink Floyd tribute band with laser show. With beer and wine available at very reasonable prices from The Store next door, Pablo doing his ‘magic’ on the grill, and assuming you like Floyd, this would appear to be just about as good as it gets...
... The next morning Warbler and his brood were spotted in downtown Boonville... Mrs. Warbler and kids at the ice cream store while the Warbler himself was seen eating tacos and drinking beer with a gathering of Valley folks from the local Mexican community, following their victory in the big adult soccer league game played that morning alongside the high school... Seems like the Warblers had a fine time getting their Valley-thing on in every which way...
... Meanwhile, Philo Pat (Hulbert) stopped by and shared much information with me about the Valley’s history the other day. It was a fascinating little chat as I simply mentioned people who had graduated from A.V.H.S. in the years 1948-54 and she knew something about many of their histories. Anyone thinking of doing Valley research of any kind would be well-served by sitting down with this Valley expert and her excellent memory of Valley folks and their times...
... From our 3-Dot regular, The Old Buzzard, comes another in his insightful series - ‘Forget The Rapture and worry about The Approach of the Apocalypse’... Buzzard reports, “Is the Boonville Post Office really closing? Now if that isn’t a sign of the Apocalypse, I don’t know what is. Say it ain’t so”... I cannot help but have some doubts regarding this rumor but Buzzard has regularly pointed out that the Apocalypse is not far off, and such a shocking development as this would certainly give more credibility to his prophesy...
Well now I think it’s time to take my leave... With the hot weather almost with us, please remember to keep your windows cracked if you have pets in your vehicle; children too I suppose... Otherwise, ‘Keep the Faith’; be careful out there; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; and may your god go with you… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Humbly yours, Turkey Vulture...
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at
p.p.s. On the sheep, Grace...

# 270 - Aug 3rd, 2011

Greetings one and all - if you are sitting comfortably then I shall begin... And what better way to do that than to sing the praises of the Guest Chef Dinner held at the Senior & Community Center last Friday evening? Having spent several hours slowly roasting and basting a 70-pound stuffed pig on a rotisserie grill, Maple Creek Winery owner, Tom Rodrigues, and his team of assistant cooks, wait staff, plus volunteer helpers from the Senior Center, served it up in professional style. It came along with a garden fresh salad, wild mushroom gravy, a medley of mashed potatoes, asparagus and gruyere cheese wrapped in prosciutto, followed by a Asian pear, pecan, and Candy Cap mushroom cake for dessert, made by Tom’s daughter Amy. Maple Creek wines were complimentary all evening long, and the gathering of seventy Valley folks were unanimously full of praise for the event, the first in a series of ‘Last Friday of the Month – Guest Chef Dinner’ evenings to raise funds for the Senior Center. Next up, it’s Diana Charles as Guest Chef on Friday, August 26th – ticket details to follow, suffice it to say, the event will no doubt sell out as it did on this occasion...
For your Quote of the Week, I would like to offer this comment from Harriet Van Horne, syndicated newspaper columnist and film/television critic of the fifties and sixties when there were few women in those fields. These words seem to encapsulate Tom Rodrigues as he volunteered his time to spend it with a roasting pig and then to serve up a delicious meal to all those fine food-lovers – “Cooking is like love – it should be entered into with abandon, or not at all”... Well, to those in attendance, he certainly looked like he was cooking with great abandonment and having a lovely time...
Public Service Announcements… #302 – The live music scene returns to the Navarro Store Amphitheatre amongst the giant redwoods for what will no doubt be excellent shows on the next two weekends. On the 6th it’s the legendary (and I mean legendary – check out his bio) American blues-harp player Charlie Musslewhite (7pm) with the Steven Bates Band opening at 5pm, then a week later it’s the always popular ‘House of Floyd’ – the Pink Floyd tribute band with laser show. With beer and wine available at very reasonable prices from The Store next door, Pablo doing his ‘magic’ on the grill, then assuming you like the blues-harp and/or Floyd, these are two Valley evenings that are as good as it gets... #303 – It’s the second Tuesday of the month on Aug 9th and that means Dinner and Bingo Night at the Senior Center – good food, beer and wine, top quality bingo with prizes, and you don’t have to be a senior to attend! So I urge you to come along and support this event and remember - all proceeds go to our Senior/Community Center... #304 – Here’s a heads-up that on Sunday, August 14th, it’s the annual Lions Club BBQ to benefit the A.V. Volunteer Ambulance at The Fairgrounds from 4.30pm to 7.30pm – certainly one for your calendars, I’d suggest... #305 – And finally this week, there’s the 2nd Annual Fundraiser for High School Fall Sports – Soccer, Football, Cheerleading, and Volleyball at The Grange on Saturday, Aug 20th. This follows the Soccer Alumni tournament that takes place from noon to 5pm that day at Tom Smith Field next to the high school. The evening event requests a $10 donation that will get you into an evening featuring a $5 Mexican dinner, $3 beer and wine, and the d.j. sounds of Alex Favella – hope to see you there. Tickets available at Lemons Market in Philo and All that good Stuff in Boonville, or at the door on the 20th...
Moving quickly on to a few of the topics under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge - yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley where people gather and share their thoughts about Valley life...
... So the hot news doing the rounds and causing much discussion at the 3-Dot is that there are plans for a Medical Marijuana store in Boonville. No, not at the Health Center where it would perhaps be seen as very appropriate and even financially beneficial, but in the heart of town, between the Live Oak Building, which is home to the Valley Bible Fellowship, and Lauren’s family restaurant, and virtually opposite The Fairgrounds... Hmmm... Hmmm... Hmmm... Let’s all think about this one...
... The current issue of Real Estate, Mendo, includes a ‘love letter’ to Anderson Valley written by Bruce ‘Pat’ Patterson that includes some of his photos. This is a free publication and can be found at stores in the Valley, including the A.V. Market. Pat says. “People won't fight for something they don't love, or love something they don't know. I don't think anybody has ever been as alienated from nature as the American consumer, so in my nature and travel writing I try'n show what folks are missing. You know, fight fire with water.”
... From our 3-Dot regular, The Old Buzzard, comes another in his insightful series - ‘Forget The Rapture and worry about The Approach of the Apocalypse’... Buzzard reports, “I heard this announcement on our local KZYX & Z public radio station late last Saturday afternoon... ‘Well let’s see what’s happening in the Valley today... (long pause)... Oh yes... (very long pause)... Lots of things... (another long pause)... Today it’s a work day for the Land Trust – hmmm, well that will be over by now”... Well, thanks for the information – better late than never, I guess, or is it?”...
... This just in... The 2012 Winner of ‘The Best Strawberries in the Valley and near points Beyond’ Award goes to the beautiful product from the garden of the late Tom Smith, as wife Val continues the excellent work. ‘Truly superb’ and ‘absolutely brilliant’ were the only comments I was capable of as I devoured a few dozen last weekend... A close second was a previous winner - the earthy-fresh and sweet tasting strawberries from Saechau Farms, just south of Ukiah on Hwy 101. These are well priced but for every four superb berries there was a lesser tasting one, unlike the mouth-watering consistency of the Smith’s produce. Despite this, Saechau may still have pushed harder for the top-up spot if not for the discourteous service that cost them some valuable points… And before some bleedin' heart p.c. liberal, who lives in the middle of nowhere and has little contact with what goes on in the real world, steps in to defend this behavior as an understandable result of a difference in cultures, I would just like to say to them, "Just stop it... Please... Now!"
Oh, dear, have I upset somebody? - I’ll get my coat and leave shall I?... But before I do, with the hot weather with us, just a reminder to keep your windows cracked if you have pets in your vehicle; children too, I suppose.. Otherwise, ‘Keep the Faith’; be careful out there; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; and may your god go with you… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Humbly yours, Turkey Vulture...
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at