# 495 - 27th January, 2016

    Greetings one and all. Are you are sitting comfortably? Then I shall begin… Let’s move straight into a few of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge – yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant (yet surprisingly reliable) Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley, a somewhat secret location that sees people get together and share their thoughts about life in Anderson Valley and often far beyond...
… Update from Crab Feed Central… There were originally 325 tickets available for this wonderful annual event taking place on Saturday, February 6, when folks from all walks of life in the Valley community will sit down to eat together. By Monday morning there were about 20 remaining. These may be gone by the time you read this but by calling Gloria Ross at 895-3071 you can go on a waiting list for any cancellations that inevitably occur…
… Hummingbird and I enjoyed a splendid meal at the newly-opened Bewildered Pig at the Floodgate in the Deep End last weekend. The restaurant looks wonderful, the ambience works very well, and the service was excellent. I won’t go into the food details, you can find out for yourselves, suffice to say it was delectable, and the twenty or so local folks there to whom I talked all had very positive things to say… This is good news for the owners obviously, but surely they already believe that everything is good - why wouldn’t they? What they might instead be wondering is if there were any adverse comments that customers could share so that they may make adjustments… With that in mind, here’s a couple of observations, neither associated with the dishes themselves which, as I mentioned, were excellent… I felt that the local wines, certainly the reds, were nearly all quite prohibitively priced and, for the first time that I can remember when dining here in the Valley, we ordered a bottle from elsewhere, a Petite Syrah from Napa. We cannot pay overinflated prices that are beyond our means for the local ‘stuff,’ although quite a few of the locals who were present quite possibly did… Another slight criticism is that there was no bread provided. I know we are a gluten-free obsessed society these days but some dishes cry out for bread as a way of fully enjoying all of the succulent sauce on the plate. The pork shank was such a dish and, in my humble opinion, for $32 it should come with complimentary bread if the customer requires. However, bread was available, appearing as a menu item - a ‘surprising’ $8 for a few slices from Ft Bragg Bakery - delicious though they were… Nevertheless, overall it was a very pleasant experience on every level and we shall certainly return… p.s. A local’s night on Sundays or Mondays will probably work well at some point - I’m just sayin’…
… I usually do my own research when it comes to the local restaurant scene but last week I learned the date of the Aquarelle Wine Bar and Cafe’s re-opening from an assistant. He was wrong and obviously he has now been ‘dealt with’ for making such an error… I apologize for any inconveniences and can inform you that in actuality they are opening on Friday, February 12. I myself can confirm that they are working on a new look, a re-focussed menu, and will have the excellent chef/owner Christina Jones at the helm… Meanwhile, the re-opening date for Libby’s Restaurant in Philo remains “a riddle wrapped up in a mystery inside an enigma”…
… Among the fourteen punctuation marks in English, the; is called a semi-colon, and the ) is a closing parenthesis… When coupled together like this ; ) most people under 50 would tell you that this is a winky-face in modern email//text/social media parlance. However, some readers may recall that in ancient times, the semi-colon was often used to separate parts of archaic written devices known as complete sentences, while parentheses were curved notations used to contain further thoughts or qualifying remarks within these devices… A ‘winky-face’ indeed?… And they say things have changed for the better?!…           
    Onward… Public Service Announcements (P.S.A.’s)… Calendars and pens at the ready… #543 - The General Knowledge and Trivia Quiz held at Lauren’s Restaurant is now on its winter/spring schedule of 7pm on the 2nd and 4th Thursdays of every month - that means there will be one tomorrow, Thursday, January 28… #544 - The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital have no more visits this month but they will be at the Anderson Valley Farm Supply on Highway 128, north of Philo, on two occasions next month - February 4 and 25… #545 - The Boonville Farmers’ Market continues every Saturday at its winter venue, outside The Boonville General Store, from 10am-12:30 pm. For more info call Cindy at 895-2949… #546 - Need a burn permit? From 11am to 3pm on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Fridays you can get one from the Firehouse in Boonville. Call 895-2020 for more information or stop by - you will be efficiently served with a smile - trust me on this… #547 - The A.V. Lending Library, run by The Unity Club, is open at The Fairgrounds on Tuesdays 1.30-4.30pm and Saturdays 2-4pm… #548 - The County Dump is open from 9am-4pm Tuesday, Wednesday, Saturday, and Sunday. Remember, no dead animals!  The number for the Dump is 895-3569 and checking first to see that they are open is probably well worth the small effort. F.Y.I., the Recycling Center in Boonville at The Fairgrounds’ parking lot is open Wednesday-Saturday, 9-4pm (489-2033)…   
    As a bonus P.S.A. here is the menu for the Community lunches over the next week in the Senior Center at the Veterans’ Building in Boonville. The Center asks for a $6 donation from seniors and charges $7 for Non-seniors… Tomorrow, Thursday, January 28, the lunch, served by Marti Titus and her crew at Noon, will be Oven Fried Chicken & Potatoes, and Lemon Bars for dessert… Then, next Tuesday, February 2, the first lunch of the month will, as always, feature Meat Loaf, Mashed Potatoes and Gravy, with Birthday Cupcakes for dessert. All meals include vegetables, salad bar, and fruit, plus milk, coffee, tea, and lemonade. What a deal - it maybe the best $7 you’ll spend all week!  Hopefully you will be able to attend, and remember – ALL ages are welcome! Hope to see you there…

    Finally, I want to return to the Three-Dot to hear from one of our regulars, The Old Buzzard, who provides us with another installment in his insightful series – ‘Signs that the Apocalypse is Approaching’… Buzzard reports, “My predictions in last weekend’s NFL Conference Championship games went 1-for-2 when my pick of a  Patriots’ win went down against an impressive Denver defensive effort, but I bounced back on Sunday afternoon with the Panthers’ humiliation of Arizona… I am now 8-for10 on the NFL play-offs overall - acceptable in any gambling situation, certainly one that is ‘for entertainment purposes only’!…I shall provide you with the much-anticipated Super Bowl pick next week…
    “Meanwhile, let’s move on to an almost as important topic - the race for the Presidency… I don’t think that many ‘real’ socialists would regard Bernie Sanders as one of their ilk. Unfortunately, many folks in this country think of this term as a ‘dirty’ word, and using it to describe him, as many people are doing, both supporters and opponents alike, is going to scare off a great number of possible followers. Sanders, whom I expect would be good company over a burger and beer, seems to be a decent, rational fellow with enlightened, left-leaning beliefs compared to many American politicians, but he is certainly not a socialist and what he’s talking about isn’t socialism of any type or form. I would call it social democracy - and there is not much wrong with that, in my humble opinion… Meanwhile, staying with presidential politics, I was just wondering - the Italian fascist dictator, Benito Mussolini, was summarily executed by anti-fascist partisans in 1945; Donald Trump was born in 1946 - coincidence or reincarnation? I think you know… And while we’ll on the subject of The Donald, the Republican debates are deplorable, classless, third-rate, and witless spectacles. I imagine sitting down for a chat with any of the these particular candidates over a burger and beer would be a most unpleasant, and ultimately dull, experience. Not at all what I would be looking for in a chat with a possible U.S. President… These ‘debates’ basically present Trump’s brutish pontifications while the rest of the candidates remain too fearful of upsetting a large part of the right wing electorate to contradict his outlandish and odious proposals. Trump’s continuing success is, given the possible consequences in November, quite disturbing, and a huge indication that the Apocalypse is Approaching…”

    I’m outta here, and taking Buzzard with me... Besides we’ve got see a man about a sheep… So, until we talk again – ‘Keep the Faith’; be careful out there; if you break a leg don’t come running to me; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; be wary of strangers with more dogs than teeth; be kind and show love to your pets; and may your god go with you… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Sometimes poking, often stroking, but almost always humbly yours, Turkey Vulture - saddened but ultimately comforted in the knowledge that the old hare has safely moved to his new burrow in the sky…
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at
p.p.s. Skylark – read any good books lately?… Hi, Silver Swan – behaving yourself? Hopefully not!… Everything cool with you, O.J.? Of course it is…

# 494 - 20th January, 2016

    Greetings one and all. Are you are sitting comfortably? Then I shall begin… Let’s get started by going straight to the  Public Service Announcements (P.S.A.’s)…
    Calendars and pens at the ready… #544 - The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital will be visiting the Valley for a second time this month - tomorrow, January 21. They will be here on two Thursdays next month - February 4 and 25. As always they will be at the Anderson Valley Farm Supply on Highway 128, north of Philo from 2-3.30pm and to avoid the rush I suggest you go later in that time period - as long as you get there before 3pm your pet will be seen… #545 - The 3rd Wednesday sees Karaoke at The Buckhorn tonight, January 20; this fun evening is hosted by Sarah Songbird Larkin of The Real Sarahs from 9pm on… #546 - Saturday, January 23, is the 4th Saturday of the month and that means it’s the Open Mic at Lauren's Restaurant in downtown Boonville. Dinner is served from 5pm until the performances start at 9pm. All are welcome - musicians, singers, poets, writers, impressionists, magicians, comedians, actors, fire-eaters, pole dancers, sword swallowers, ventriloquists, raconteurs, exotic dancers, animal callers, etc. No clowns - apparently they would scare any kids who might be there, and no mimes, please - they scare almost everyone else! For more information call 895-3869… #547 - The Mendocino Bookmobile returns to the Valley on Tuesday, January 26. They are here on alternate Tuesdays for 45 minutes at each of these places and times: Navarro Store 9am (for just 30 minutes before heading out to Comptche); the Floodgate 12.30pm; Philo 1.30pm; Boonville (Apple Hall) 2.30pm. Phone 463-4694 for further details… #548 - The A.V Museum - ‘The Best Little Museum in the West’ - at The Little Red Schoolhouse next to the Elementary School on A.V. Way remains closed on their winter break until February…
    As a bonus P.S.A. here is the menu for the Community lunches and dinners over the next week in the Senior Center at the Veterans’ Building in Boonville. The Center asks for a $6 donation from seniors for both lunches and dinners and charges $7 for Non-seniors for lunches and $8 for the dinners… Tomorrow, Thursday, January 21, the lunch, served by Marti Titus and her crew at Noon, will be Breakfast for Lunch with Oatmeal Bars for dessert… Then, next Tuesday evening, January 26 at 6pm, the dinner will feature Chicken Thighs with Kale and Texas Sheet Cake for dessert. All meals include vegetables, salad bar, and fruit, plus milk, coffee, tea, and lemonade. What a deal - it maybe the best $7 you’ll spend all week!  Hopefully you will be able to attend, and remember – ALL ages are welcome! Hope to see you there… 

    Moving quickly on to a few of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge – yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant (yet surprisingly reliable) Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley, a somewhat secret location that sees people get together and share their thoughts about life in Anderson Valley and often far beyond, and where we subscribe to the Winston Churchill philosophy that “A lie will get halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to put on its pants”… So, with that in mind, I shall quickly put my pants on and continue with a report dominated by the Valley's food/restaurant scene… 
… Update from Crab Feed Central… Tickets are selling fast for what is perhaps our most Valley community-centric event of the year, The ‘Original’ Crab Feed to benefit the Catholic Church on Saturday, February 6. They are priced at $45 each and there will be just 300 available. This is the 14th year of the Original Crab Feed and it is more popular than ever. Some folks have commented about the scarcity of local crab and offer the cancellation of the Valley’s other Crab Feed (for the Senior Center) as evidence of this, but I can inform you that the organizers of the Original Feed have gone further afield, getting theirs from either Washington State or Alaska, and there will be plenty of premium crab for all. To buy your tickets, call either Gloria Ross at 895-3071 or John  Schultz at 895-9552…
… Last week I mentioned my intent to exclusively reveal a new development on our local restaurant scene. Well that time has now arrived… Stone and Embers restaurant at the Madrones complex just south of Philo is reopening on Friday, February 19th under a new partnership, and dinner service will be resumed… New investor Matt Barnes has been a regular customer since the restaurant opened and he will join Patrick Meany, chef/owner, and chef Jon Fussell, who will also become a partner. The two chefs began using fruits and vegetables from Matt’s Three Dog Farm in 2013 and the three of them saw an opportunity to work together to create a farming plan and ever-changing menu where over 75% of the produce will come directly from the Farm, only two miles away from the restaurant… Initially they will open Fridays to Mondays from 11:30am to 8:30pm each day, like a ‘proper’ restaurant for everyone, adding Thursdays as Summer approaches…
… The long-awaited and much-anticipated opening weekend of The Bewildered Pig at the location at the Floodgate in the Valley’s Deep End is upon us - from tomorrow, January 21 thru’ Sunday, January 24th. I cannot imagine that drop-in’s will be available so I urge you to make reservations if you wish to be amongst the first to check out the latest addition to the Valley’s culinary scene. They are at 895-2088 and, after all the hard work put in by the owners to get to get to this point, we here at The Nest wish them every success…
… Continuing with the topic of local restaurants, following a winter break, Aquarelle Wine Bar and Cafe in Boonville is re-opening this week also - on Friday, January 22, and a little bird told me that they are working on a new look, a re-focussed menu, and with chef/owner Christina Jones at the helm… Meanwhile, Libby’s Restaurant in Philo will be starting up again soon-ish, on a date nobody seems to know…
… With all of these ‘new’ developments, one cannot help but think how everyone involved must be dreaming of great success and longevity here in the Valley - something Lauren’s Restaurant in Boonville will be celebrating twenty years of on February 27 - I shall be sharing the details of this special event with you soon…
… King Goat has confirmed that there will be beer and wine available at this year’s Goat Festival and Wildflower Show in late April. The children in attendance will probably see the adults sipping these beverages, but the fear-mongers, naysayers, puritanical knuckle-draggers, and cave-dweller should not be unduly concerned, I cannot imagine that the kids will be too traumatized by such a sight…
… Our 3-Dot regular, The Old Buzzard reports on his recent run of gambling success on NFL games, “As regular readers will be aware, at this time of year I do have some ‘well-informed’ insights into the N.F.L. play-offs that would have led to significant financial gain in the past, if professional sports betting was legal of course… Following a four-for-four success rate over the opening weekend of the play-offs, I followed this up last weekend when I went three-for-four, being correct with my Green Bay, Seattle, and Pittsburgh predictions. These three teams lost their games but each of them covered with the points they were given - in my circles at the big boys’ table, point-spread gambling is the only way to go, a place not for the faint of heart or fearful… I missed out on on a second successive weekend sweep when New England beat Kansas City by 7 when I had taken a good KC team getting 5 points… Here are my selections for the coming weekend’s two Conference Championship games - I like Carolina at home against Arizona even if the Panthers are giving the Cardinals 3 points or so, and then I must go with the Patriots in Denver, although they will be giving the Broncos about 3 points also… Obviously, I should once again reiterate that in a family newspaper such as the A.V.A., gambling talk cannot be condoned, which is why I must emphasize that this is presented for entertainment purposes only, to be discussed with one’s loved ones over Sunday breakfast before dropping them off at church and heading for the bar and settling in for seven hours of eating, drinking, and football…
   
    Well now I think it’s time to take my leave… Besides I’ve got see a man about a sheep… So, until we talk again – ‘Keep the Faith’; be careful out there; if you break a leg don’t come running to me; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; be wary of strangers with more dogs than teeth; show love to your pets; and may your god go with you… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Sometimes poking, often stroking, but almost always humbly yours, Turkey Vulture - saddened but ultimately comforted in the knowledge that the old hare has safely moved to his new burrow in the sky…
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at
p.p.s. Keep on humming, Hummingbird… On the sheep, Grace…

# 493 - 13th January, 2016

    Greetings one and all. Are you are sitting comfortably? Then I shall begin…
    This coming Monday, January 18, is the day on which we observe Martin Luther King’s birthday, and with the world facing so much chaos and uncertainty, and witnessing hatred, cruelty, and conflict in so many places, it certainly seems as appropriate a time as ever to pay heed to his words, “We must learn to live together as brothers, or perish together as fools”… And that concise and perceptive remark, as true today as on the day he uttered it, is your Quote of the Week…

    Public Service Announcements (P.S.A.’s)… Calendars and pens at the ready… #543 - The General Knowledge and Trivia Quiz held at Lauren’s Restaurant is now on its winter/spring schedule of 7pm on the 2nd and 4th Thursdays of every month… #544 - The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital will be visiting the Valley on two Thursdays this month - firstly tomorrow, January 14, and then again next week, January 21. As always they will be at the Anderson Valley Farm Supply on Highway 128, north of Philo from 2-3.30pm and to avoid the rush I suggest you go later in that time period - as long as you get there before 3pm your pet will be seen… #545 - Need a burn permit? From 11am to 3pm on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Fridays you can get one from the Firehouse in Boonville. Call 895-2020 for more information or stop by - you will be efficiently served with a smile - trust me on this… #546 - The Boonville Farmers’ Market continues every Saturday at its winter venue, outside The Boonville General Store, from 10am-12:30 pm. For more info call Cindy at 895-2949… #547 - The A.V. Lending Library, run by The Unity Club, is open at The Fairgrounds on Tuesdays 1.30-4.30pm and Saturdays 2-4pm… #548 - The County Dump is open from 9am-4pm Tuesday, Wednesday, Saturday, and Sunday. Remember, no dead animals!  The number for the Dump is 895-3569 and checking first to see that they are open is probably well worth the small effort. F.Y.I., the Recycling Center in Boonville at The Fairgrounds’ parking lot is open Wednesday-Saturday, 9-4pm (489-2033)… #549 - I am led to believe that the ‘Second Wednesday Drumming Circle’ will be taking place at The Grange tonight, Wednesday, January 13 from 7-9pm. To confirm, perhaps call Andy at 895-3020…
    As a bonus P.S.A. here is the menu for the Community lunches over the next week in the Senior Center at the Veterans’ Building in Boonville. The Center asks for a $6 donation from seniors and charges $7 for Non-seniors… Tomorrow, Thursday, January 14, the lunch, served by Marti Titus and her crew at Noon, will be Vegetable Beef & Barley Soup with Banana Split Cake for dessert… Then, next Tuesday, January 19 at 6pm, the lunch will feature General Tso's Chicken with Carrot Cake for dessert. All meals include vegetables, salad bar, and fruit, plus milk, coffee, tea, and lemonade. What a deal - it maybe the best $7 you’ll spend all week!  Hopefully you will be able to attend, and remember – ALL ages are welcome! Hope to see you there… 

    Moving quickly on to a few of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge – yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant (yet surprisingly reliable) Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley, a somewhat secret location that sees people get together and share their thoughts about life in Anderson Valley and often far beyond…
… Update from Crab Feed Central… Tickets for perhaps our most Valley community-centric event of the year, The ‘Original’ Crab Feed to benefit the Catholic Church on Saturday, February 6, are now on sale - and selling fast! They are priced at $45 each and there will be just 300 available. This is the 14th year of the ‘Original’ Feed and it is more popular than ever so they will sell out. To buy yours, call either Gloria Ross at 895-3071 or John  Schultz at 895-9552…
… ‘The cat is out of the bag’… Or to be more accurate, ‘the pig is out of the sty’… Yes, the long-awaited and much-anticipated opening of The Bewildered Pig has been announced. They will present their opening weekend at the location at the Floodgate in the Valley’s Deep End, formerly occupied by Coq au Vin, from Thursday, January 21 thru’ Sunday, January 24th. I cannot imagine that drop-in’s will be available so I urge you to make reservations if you wish to be amongst the first to check out the latest addition to the Valley’s culinary scene. They are at 895-2088 and, after all the hard work put in by the owners to get to get to this point, we here at The Nest wish them every success, and not just because they are less than ten minutes flying time away!…
… While we are on the topic of local restaurants, a little bird told me that, following a winter break, Aquarelle Cafe is re-opening on Friday, January 22, with Libby’s Restaurant starting up again on a date nobody seems to know… Meanwhile, I hope to exclusively reveal a new development on our local restaurant scene in the next week or two - at this point I couldn’t possibly comment further…
…  Several regulars reported that they thoroughly enjoyed their evening of basketball last Friday at the high school gym in Boonville. This was as a direct result of watching the victories against Mendocino for both the varsity and junior varsity boys’ teams, 52-45 and 42-28 respectively. Although the local girls went down valiantly in their match-up with the Cardinals, the two wins for the boys were as sweet as they always are against their traditional rivals, whose Varsity boys’ team in all likelihood will be battling the Panthers for the league title this season…
… From our 3-Dot regular, The Old Buzzard, comes another in his insightful series – ‘Signs that the Apocalypse is Approaching’… Buzzard reports, “As regular readers will be aware, at this time of year I do have some insights into the N.F.L. play-offs that have led to significant financial gain in the past. Or they certainly would have, if professional sports betting was legal of course… Although you will have to take my word for it, I was correct on three of the four play-off games last weekend and expect this trend to continue. Here are my selections for the coming weekend’s games - against the point-spread of course, after all we’re at the big boys’ table and it’s not a place for the faint of heart or fearful… I like the 5 1/2 points that a dangerous Kansas City (adequately quarter-backed by former49er Alex Smith) are being given to take on Coach Belichick and his Patriots in New England on Saturday afternoon. As he has done so often before, Tom Brady may end up getting his team a win but I am betting they do not do so by more than 5… Up next, with some hesitation I recommend that you take the 7 points and go with Green Bay to not lose by more than that in Arizona…  On Sunday morning, Carolina will surely stomp the Seattle Seahawks whose good fortune must end at some point, and the Panthers’ victory will be by more than the 3 points they will have to give… And for the final game of the weekend, I am going with the Steelers to straight up beat an unconvincing Payton Manning-led Denver Broncos. The Steelers will not even need any of the points they will get in spread-betting circles…… At least three of these will surely be winners because a winning percentage of 50% or less is unacceptable at this level, even if it is just for fun and money is not involved. However, if more than one goes awry then you will know that the ‘fix is in’ and that the N.F.L. and its associates in Las Vegas are even more intertwined and crooked that we thought - a sure sign that the Apocalypse is rapidly approaching… Obviously, in a family newspaper such as the A.V.A., gambling talk cannot be condoned, which is why I must emphasize that this is presented for entertainment purposes only, to be discussed around the family dining table with one’s nearest and dearest as everyone nibbles on apple pie and ice cream before sitting down to watch re-runs of ‘The Little House on the Prairie’.…

    I’m outta here, and I’m taking the Old Buzzard with me; we’ve got see a man about a sheep… So, until we talk again – ‘Keep the Faith’; be careful out there; if you break a leg don’t come running to me; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; be wary of strangers with more dogs than teeth; be kind and show love to your pets; and may your god go with you… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Sometimes poking, often stroking, but almost always humbly yours, Turkey Vulture - saddened but ultimately comforted in the knowledge that the old hare has safely moved to his new burrow in the sky…
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at
p.p.s. Keep on wagging that tail, Fred… Hi, Silver Swan – behaving yourself? Hopefully not!… Espero que usted está teniendo un gran tiempo, Round-eyed Robin…

# 492 - 6th January, 2016

     Greetings one and all. Are you are sitting comfortably? Then I shall begin… How are your New Year’s Resolutions coming along? Surely better than mine, which were all out the window, in tatters, by late on Sunday, January 3rd… But, we must carry on and what better place to start than with this week’s Public Service Announcements (P.S.A.’s)…           Calendars and pens at the ready… #544 - The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital will be visiting the Valley on two Thursdays this month - January 14 and 21, when they will be at the Anderson Valley Farm Supply on Highway 128, north of Philo from 2-3.30pm… #545 - The Mendocino Bookmobile returns to the Valley on Tuesday, January 12. They are here on alternate Tuesdays for 45 minutes at each of these places and times: Navarro Store 9am (for just 30 minutes before heading out to Comptche); the Floodgate 12.30pm; Philo 1.30pm; Boonville (Apple Hall) 2.30pm. Phone 463-4694 for further details… #546 - There will be no Barn Sales at The Big Barn on A.V. Way for the next couple of months as those involved in organizing the monthly event take a winter break to organize the Crab Feed (see Three-Dot Lounge section below) and other events… #547 - My research so far has led me to discover that the next visit to the Valley by the Mendocino County Haz-Mat vehicle will not be until March 26! Of course trying to confirm with the County ‘government’ that such a visit is really that far in the future has proven to be far from easy, but I am working on it… #548 - The A.V Museum is open every Saturday and Sunday, from 1-4pm. Situated in The Little Red Schoolhouse next to the Elementary School on A.V. Way, this is a perfect thing to do in the Valley when you have a couple of hours spare on a weekend afternoon. It is not without good reason that it is generally regarded as ‘The Best Little Museum in the West’… #549 - The Anderson Valley Grange is having its regular second Sunday Pancake Breakfast on Jan 9 from 8:30-11am. Prices range from $5-10 (kids through hungry folks) for a delicious, locally-sourced breakfast. Choices include pancakes (gluten free available), eggs, and bacon, with a choice of juice, tea or coffee included…

    As a bonus P.S.A. here is the menu for the Community lunches and dinners over the next week in the Senior Center at the Veterans’ Building in Boonville. The Center asks for a $6 donation from seniors for both lunches and dinners and charges $7 for Non-seniors for lunches and $8 for the dinners… Tomorrow, Thursday, January 7, the lunch, served by Marti Titus and her crew at Noon, will be a Sausage Skillet and Noodles with Wendy's Oatmeal Bar for dessert… Then, next Tuesday evening, January 12 at 6pm, the dinner will feature Tamale Loaf and Better Cake for dessert. As this is the 2nd Tuesday of the month, the dinner will be followed by Bingo at 7pm… All meals include vegetables, salad bar, and fruit, plus milk, coffee, tea, and lemonade. What a deal - it maybe the best $7 you’ll spend all week!  Hopefully you will be able to attend, and remember – ALL ages are welcome! Hope to see you there… 

    Moving quickly on to a few of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge – yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant (yet surprisingly reliable) Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley, a somewhat secret location that sees people get together and share their thoughts about life in Anderson Valley and often far beyond, and where we subscribe to the Winston Churchill philosophy that “A lie will get halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to put on its pants”… So, with that in mind, I shall quickly put my pants on and continue…
… Latest update from Crab Feed Central… Tickets for perhaps our most community-centric event of the year, The ‘Original’ Crab Feed to benefit the Catholic Church on Saturday, February 6, are now on sale. They are priced at $45 each and there will be just 300 available - they will sell out. To buy yours, call either Gloria Ross at 895-3071 or John  Schultz at 895-9552…
… With our local eateries and stores operating under somewhat confusing hours of operation at this time of year, you can be sure that the Pic ‘n’ Pay in the heart of Boonville will be open just about whenever you need it to be. Those guys saved the day with that pound of butter on Christmas morning - crucial for the creamy mashed potatoes! Meanwhile, as always, I encourage you to “support your local businesses – you’d miss them if they weren’t there”, and always consider the mantra that “eating out is fun!”…
… School is back in session and, being aware of the many distractions confronting high school kids these days, I can only hope that they put a concerted effort into their studies over the important upcoming months – come on boys and girls, give it your all, particularly you seniors - you know it makes sense… I may be an old fart but I am right on this. Trust me, and you can thank me later…
… And while we’re talking about the school, how about the curriculum featuring a class entitled ‘Life in the Real World 101’ at the high school - a sort of combination of what used to be called ‘civics’ (the rights and duties of citizens) and social skills?... In my experience, most of the students could certainly use some pointers in the right direction with regard to these areas…
… From our 3-Dot regular, The Old Buzzard, comes another in his insightful series – ‘Signs that the Apocalypse is Approaching’… Buzzard reports, “I propose that no more winery tasting rooms are opened anytime soon. The wine in the Valley is obviously very good and I enjoy it as much as anyone, but don’t we have enough places to try it at this point? Enough already! Particularly if any new ones were to be simply ego-wineries, owned by those who assume they can make wine just because he/she has made their millions in an entirely different expertise, somewhere else. And certainly not if they continue to reside in some far flung location, have never lived here, rarely visit, install gaudy gated enclaves, and wouldn’t know a wild hog if it bit them in the ass or a Turkey Vulture if it defecated on their head…”

    I’m outta here and, after that little rant, I should probably escort the Old Buzzard out too… Besides we’ve got see a man about a sheep… Anyway, that’s enough for now, “please take me drunk, I’m home,” and until we talk again – ‘Keep the Faith’; be careful out there; if you break a leg don’t come running to me; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; be wary of strangers with more dogs than teeth; show love to your pets; and may your god go with you… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Sometimes poking, often stroking, but almost always humbly yours, Turkey Vulture…
    Oh, before I go, I was wondering whether you knew that we Turkey Vultures are not mere meat-guzzling carnivores; we like our ‘veggies’? Yes, folks, a recent study of almost 400 of my brethren’s pellets collected in the Castro Valley and Livermore areas in California showed that plant material was the single most common ingredient of the Turkey Vulture's diet. The material consisted primarily of grass and leaves. However, before we go all vegan/vegetarian on you, I am proud to announce that there were plenty of animal food items in the pellets. These included: shrew, mole, squirrel, gopher, mouse, rat, rabbit, bird, reptile, insect, muskrat, opossum, raccoon, skunk, badger, sheep, and coyote – impressive, eh? Particularly when you consider that if not consumed and sterilized by my relatives and me, these carcasses would have rotted on the ground and could have spread disease. We truly are nature’s garbage collectors and it’s not always as glamorous as you may think…  
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at
p.p.s. Keep on humming, Hummingbird… Missing the Venerable Pheasant everyday… On the sheep, Grace…