# 556 - 29th March, 2017

   
    Greetings one and all. Are you are sitting comfortably? Then I shall begin…
    Let’s begin with the Turkey Vulture’s update on ‘Evening Dining in the Valley’… In geographical order, as you travel through the Valley on Highway 128, here is the latest on ‘The Big Eight Eateries’… Lauren’s Restaurant (895-3869) continues with their regular hours of lunch on Thursday-Sunday, 11.30am-2.30pm, and dinner on Tuesday-Saturday, 5-9pm… Lizbby’s, the new Mexican Restaurant in downtown Boonville, is open every day except Tuesdays, serving breakfast (on Saturday and Sunday) and lunch from 10am-3pm and dinner from 5-8pm… The Buckhorn’s planned re-opening on Monday April 3, has been pushed back a week to April 10 - no surprise there, that’s often how these things go when dealing with government agencies. Let’s just hope that it isn’t delayed any further - a person could die of draft Guinness withdrawal around here… The Boonville Hotel continues with their family-style, prix fixe menu served Friday thru’ Sunday… With the owners seemingly busy around the premises, Aquarelle Cafe and Wine Bar is looking at re-opening very shortly, with a new menu to accompany their new hours of operation - again, hopefully they will fill us in on the details… The Redwood Drive-In just keeps on doing what they do, with reliable hours - don't forget to try the donuts!… Stone and Embers has moved to spring hours that see them open from Noon to 8pm Friday-Sunday and Noon to 4pm on Monday and Tuesday… The Bewildered Pig! has announced that their experiment with a Mexican night has come to an end and they will now be offering their whole dinner menu on Wednesdays, although they will continue to feature a ‘South of the Border’ dish too. They are open Wednesday-Sunday, 5:30-9pm… And that’s it for now… Join us again next week for another culinary cruise along the Dining Highway… Meanwhile, I encourage you all to eat, drink, and be merry…

    Onward!… Public Service Announcements (P.S.A.’s)… Calendars and pens at the ready… #543 - This Friday, March 31, sees a special opportunity for pet lovers of the Valley. Sponsored by the A.V. Animal Rescue, there will be a low-cost ’Care-a-Van’ spay, neuter, and vaccine clinic held at The Grange in Philo beginning at 10am. Call 888-7698 for an appointment for spay and neuter surgeries; $10-$13 for vaccinations - no appointment needed. Do yourself and your pet a favor and take advantage of this rare occasion here in the Valley… #544 - Staying with the topic of your pets, the Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital will be here at The Farm Supply twice next month - Thursdays April 13 and 20. New customers and their pets are always welcome and previous visitors should be aware that they can call 462-8833 and the vets will bring your pet’s charts with them - making this an even better service than it already is!… #545 - I believe that the Mendocino Bookmobile returns to the Valley next Tuesday, April 4. Phone 463-4694 for confirmation. They are usually here on alternate Tuesdays for 45 minutes at each of these places and times: Navarro Store 9am (for just 30 minutes before heading out to Comptche); the Floodgate 12.30pm; Philo 1.30pm; Boonville (Apple Hall) 2.30pm.… #546 - The A.V Museum has reopened after the winter break. They are open every Saturday and Sunday from 1pm-4pm. Situated in The Little Red Schoolhouse next to the Elementary School on A.V. Way, visiting the Museum is a perfect thing to do in the Valley when you have a couple of hours to spare on a weekend afternoon. It is not without reason that it is generally regarded as ‘The Best Little Museum in the West’… #547 - Following it’s own winter break, the monthly Barn Sale resumes this coming Saturday/Sunday, April 1/2 from 9am-3pm at The Big Barn next to the St. Elizabeth Seton Catholic Church Refectory on A.V. Way, just north of Boonville…
    As a bonus P.S.A. here is the menu for the Community lunches and dinners over the next week in the Senior Center at the Veterans’ Building in Boonville. The Center asks for a $6 donation from seniors and charges $7 for Non-seniors… Tomorrow, Thursday, March 30, the lunch, served by Marti Titus and her crew at Noon, will be Chicken Lo Mein with Poppy Seed cake for dessert… Then, next Tuesday, April 4, the lunch will feature Meat Loaf and Mashed potatoes followed by Strawberry Shortcake for dessert. All meals include vegetables, salad bar, and fruit, plus milk, coffee, tea, and lemonade. What a deal - it maybe the best value for money you’ll get all week!… Starting next Tuesday, April 4, an exciting new activity will take place on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 9-9.45am when the Center offers ‘Young at Heart Exercise’ with Linda Boudoures and Karen DeFalco… Tai Chi is available every Tuesday at 11am, while on Thursdays at 11am it is Kathy’s Easy-stretch Yoga class. Also on Thursdays, the Active Life Club runs from 10am to 2pm and features games, crafts, and music. The Senior Center/Community Bus goes to Ukiah on Monday's and also Santa Rosa on the first Wednesday of the month. These trips fill up fast so don't forget to sign up early at 489-1175… Hopefully you will be able to attend some of these events and certainly the lunches and dinners, and remember – ALL ages are welcome! Hope to see you there…

    Moving quickly on to a few of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge – yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant (yet surprisingly reliable) Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley, a somewhat secret location that sees people get together and share their thoughts about life in Anderson Valley and often far beyond…
… Several 3-Dot regulars have been discussing the planned staffing changes at our local schools that are known by some to be either definitely taking place, or are in the works… With our Superintendent (Michelle Hutchins) and both principals (Katherine Reddick and Keri St Joer) all relatively new to the Valley, one hopes that they fully understand that we expect prompt and full disclosure of all matters regarding these institutions to be shared with the community at all times… Just sayin’…
… Natalie’s Sunday Supper at Lauren's Restaurant on Sunday evening was once again a lovely event. With dimmed lighting and soft music in the background, the fish and chips, Shepherd’s pie, Fried chicken, and several other home-style comfort foods were a big success with the customers who had high praise for this unique Valley dining experience that currently only happens on the last Sunday of each month… I suggest you mark the next one on your calendar for Sunday, April 30th…
… This week’s most irritating phrase according to the regulars here at the 3-Dot is “They have a gluten free option which is awesome” - how mindless is that little combo of words?… Runner-up was “I know he is always late or likely to let you down completely, but he is a nice guy” - no, he is actually a dumbass…
... Another topic under discussion at the 3-Dot this past week was ‘Jobs we would hate to do’ and I surprised some regulars with my choice of air steward. Having spent time on many long haul flights I am convinced that this line of work is not at all the glamorous occupation that it’s frequently depicted as. You are dealing with a grumpy and frequently overly demanding public and basically you are a waiter/waitress in a very cramped restaurant serving quite poor food. So job seekers, trust me on this, don't apply – you can thank me later…
… From our 3-Dot regular, The Old Buzzard, comes another in his insightful series – ‘The Approach of the Apocalypse’… Buzzard reports, “I feel I must respond to a letter I received a few weeks ago regarding my critical remarks about those who attend charity events and bring their own food. The author of the note defended his/her actions and stated that I was part of a ‘group of people who look down on brown-baggers, seeing them as some sort of cheapskates’. Err, when people attend charity functions with their own food then yes I do, and why would I think otherwise? Please don’t tell me that a $2 taco or $1 cookie is too expensive for anyone. It is not. With quality food and drink on sale for very reasonable prices at virtually all of the charity events around here, and every penny of profit going to local charities, calling them ‘cheapskates’ is being very polite I’d say. In fact ‘Tight-fisted, cheap bastards’ is more along the lines of what I really think. (I’d use the word ‘niggardly’ but that would be far too controversial for those unfamiliar with the word and who are not inclined to look it up in a dictionary)…”
   
    Oh, dear, has Buzzard upset somebody? Oh well, he and I are outta here - we’ve got see a man about a sheep… So until we talk again – be careful out there; if you break a leg don’t come running to me; stay out of the ditches; be wary of strangers with more dogs than teeth; show love to your pets, they will be faithful and true to you to the last beat of their hearts, and please remember to keep your windows cracked if you leave them in your vehicle for any amount of time; think good thoughts; ‘Keep the Faith’; try to not let life get in the way of living; may your god go with you, and may your dog go with you too… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Sometimes poking, often stroking, but almost always humbly yours, Turkey Vulture - saddened but ultimately comforted in the knowledge that the old hare has safely moved to his new burrow in the sky…
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at
p.p.s. Hi, George – hope you and Sheila are well… Is that ‘lafter’ I hear, Carroll?… Bobwhite Quail - keep up the knitting!

# 555 - 22nd March, 2017

   Greetings one and all. Are you are sitting comfortably? Then I shall begin… First, I must point out that almost everything below is true, probably around 99%. However, the whole truth is withheld because, as a wise Valley man known as Deekin' once said, “If I told you the whole truth then you’d be as smart as me”… I like your thinkin,’ Deekin’…

    Let’s move on with The Turkey Vulture’s ‘Evening Dining in the Valley Update’… In geographical order, as you travel along on Highway 128, here is the latest on ‘The Tasty Eight’ that make up a wonderful culinary cruise through the Valley… Natalie Matson, co-owner of Lauren’s Restaurant, will present her monthly ‘Sunday Supper’ this coming Sunday, March 26, from 5-8.30pm, featuring comfort dining in a cozy atmosphere at Lauren’s that will warm you inside and out. This is a lovely evening that I hope to see you at - ‘proper’ fish and chips anyone?… Huevos Rancheros is now available every day at Lizbby’s Restaurant in Boonville. And chilaquiles quite often too - ya gotta like that!… The Buckhorn, Anderson Valley (as it is henceforth to be known) is still looking at that Monday, April 3 for their big re-opening night… The Boonville Hotel continues with their family-style, prix fixe menu served Friday thru’ Sunday… Aquarelle Cafe and Wine Bar is looking at an early April re-opening with a new menu to accompany their new hours of operation… The Redwood Drive-In just keeps on doing what they do, with reliable hours - try the donuts!… Stone and Embers has hours that see them open from Noon to 8pm Friday-Sunday and Noon to 4pm on Monday and Tuesday… The Bewildered Pig! down in the Deep End, is open Wednesday - Sunday, 5:30-9pm… And that’s the end of our journey along The Dining Highway for this week… Eat, drink, and be merry…

    Public Service Announcements (P.S.A.’s)… Calendars and pens at the ready… #543 - Next Friday, March 31, sees a special opportunity for pet lovers here in the Valley. There will be a low-cost ’Care-a-Van’ spay, neuter, and vaccine clinic held at The Grange in Philo beginning at 8am. Call 888-7698 for appointment. Be sure to say it's for the Boonville Clinic. Do yourself and your pet a favor and take advantage of this rare occasion… #544 - The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital have one more visit this month - tomorrow, Thursday, March 23 from 2-3.30pm. To avoid a line perhaps turn up at around 3pm - you will definitely be seen. They will be here twice next month - April 13 and 20. New customers and their pets are always welcome and previous visitors should be aware that they can call 462-8833 and the vets will bring your pet’s charts with them - making this an even better service than it already is!… #545 - The Boonville Farmers’ Market continues with its Winter location and hours at The Boonville General Store, on Saturdays from 11am-1pm. For more info, call Cindy at 895-2949… #546 - Need a burn permit? From 11am-3pm on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Fridays you can get one from the Firehouse in Boonville. Call 895-2020 for more information or stop by and you will be efficiently served with a smile - trust me on this… #547 - The A.V. Lending Library run by The Unity Club is open Tuesdays from 1.30-4.30pm and Saturdays 2-4pm at The Fairgrounds in Boonville… #548 - The County Dump is open from 9am-4pm Tuesday, Wednesday, Saturday, and Sunday. Dump Executive Director, Mike Mannix, rewards good customers with a star but will be very harsh with anyone thinking they can leave dead animals!… #549 - The first Barn Sale of the year will take place over the weekend of April 1/2 from 9am-3pm each day at The Big Barn next to the St. Elizabeth Seton Catholic Church Refectory on A.V. Way just north of Boonville… #550 - On Saturday, February 25, it’s the Open Mic at Lauren's Restaurant in downtown Boonville. Dinner is served 5-9pm before the Open mic starts at 9pm. Sign-ups begin at 8.30pm. All are welcome - musicians, singers, poets, writers, impressionists, magicians, comedians, actors, fire-eaters, pole dancers, sword swallowers, ventriloquists, raconteurs, exotic dancers, animal callers, etc. No clowns - apparently they would scare any kids who might be there, and no mimes, please - they scare almost everyone else! For more information call 895-3869. Hope to see you there…
    As a bonus P.S.A. here is the menu for the Community lunches and dinners over the next week in the Senior Center at the Veterans’ Building in Boonville. The Center asks for a $6 donation from seniors for both lunches and dinners and charges $7 for Non-seniors for lunches and $8 for the dinners… Tomorrow, Thursday, March 23, the lunch, served by Marti Titus and her crew at Noon, will be Fish and Chips followed by Raspberry Whip for dessert… Then, next Tuesday, March 28, the evening meal served at 6pm, will feature Brisket and then Strawberry Slab Pie for dessert. All meals include vegetables, salad bar, and fruit, plus milk, coffee, tea, and lemonade. What a deal - it maybe the best value for money you’ll get all week!… Tai Chi is now available every Tuesday at 11am, while on Thursdays at 11am it is Kathy’s Easy-stretch Yoga class. Also on Thursdays, the Active Life Club runs from 10am to 2pm and features games, crafts, and music. The Senior Center/Community Bus goes to Ukiah on Monday's and also Santa Rosa on the first Wednesday of the month. These trips fill up fast so don't forget to sign up early at 489-1175… Hopefully you will be able to attend some of these events and certainly the lunches and dinners, and remember – ALL ages are welcome! Hope to see you there…

    Moving quickly on to a few of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge – yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant (yet surprisingly reliable) Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley, a somewhat secret location that sees people get together and share their thoughts about life in Anderson Valley and often far beyond, and where we subscribe to the Winston Churchill philosophy that “A lie will get halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to put on its pants”… So, with that in mind, I shall quickly put my pants on and continue…
… Last week, with the clouds disappearing and temperatures rising, I believe a couple of local gentlemen knew exactly what to do with themselves during that temporary break from the rain. I overheard this little interchange in town as the sunshine streamed down over the Valley. One asked the other, “What can we do on a sunny afternoon in Anderson Valley?’ To which his friend replied without any hesitation, ‘Smoke weed and hang out in a hot tub’… I guess it’s as good a plan as any for many folks around here…
… Around 100 Valley folks gathered at The Apple Hall in Boonville for the annual St Patrick’s Day fundraiser for the Senior Center. Once again the Board did a splendid job of organizing the event, the corned beef was delicious, and some people enjoyed seconds… And one or two even had thirds - mentioning no names…
… From our 3-Dot regular, The Old Buzzard, comes another in his insightful series – ‘Signs that the Apocalypse is Approaching’… Buzzard reports, “Lets go straight to ‘The Trump Thing,’ or as it had been known for almost 250 years up until now - The U.S. Presidency… Claims by Donald Trump that the Obama administration carried out surveillance on him during and after the presidential campaign were roundly rejected in America and Britain. America’s Senate Intelligence Committee released a statement suggesting there was no evidence for it and GCHQ, Britain’s electronic-intelligence agency, said the claims were “utterly ridiculous and should be ignored”. Mr Trump stands by the assertion… The Trump administration released a budget plan that would beef up the armed forces but eat into other departments. It envisages cuts of almost one-third for the Environmental Protection Agency, the State Department and foreign aid. The Pentagon and the Department of Homeland Security would get 9% and 7% more, respectively… Every day our ‘Supreme Leader’ does or says something that surely means the Apocalypse is a little closer…”

    I’m outta here - I’ve got see a man about a sheep… So, until we talk again – be careful out there; if you break a leg don’t come running to me; stay out of the ditches; be wary of strangers with more dogs than teeth; show love to your pets, they will be faithful and true to you to the last beat of their hearts, and please remember to keep your windows cracked if you leave them in your vehicle for any amount of time; think good thoughts; ‘Keep the Faith’; try to not let life get in the way of living; may your god go with you, and may your dog go with you too… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Sometimes poking, often stroking, but almost always humbly yours, Turkey Vulture - saddened but ultimately comforted in the knowledge that the old hare has safely moved to his new burrow in the sky…
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at
p.p.s. Skylark – read any good books lately?… Hi, Silver Swan – behaving yourself? Hopefully not!… Everything cool with you, O.J.? Of course it is…
   

   

# 554 - 15th March, 2017

    Greetings one and all. Are you are sitting comfortably? Then I shall begin…
    First up this week - ‘The Trump Thing,’ or as it had been known for nearly 250 years up until now - The U.S. Presidency… On this occasion we have commentary from our top investigative reporter, The Old Buzzard, who adds these thoughts as part of his insightful series – ‘Signs that the Apocalypse is Approaching’… Buzzard observes, “You’ve seen Donald Trump's egregiously long, taped-together ties. You've seen Steve Bannon's need to wear half the contents of his closet all at once. So now let us turn our gaze to yet another sartorial sin being committed by this controversial administration: Sean Spicer's ties. For some inexplicable reason, the White House press secretary prefers ties for which "electric" is the main color descriptor. And the material? It's so thick and stiff that it looks like it requires a hydraulic press to tie it. As a general rule, bright blue with fire engine red, silver, and baby blue stripes is a palette that should be avoided by anyone not in a profession that requires a degree from clown college.
    “Now, as you might know, Spicer has taken a lot of heat for his ill-fitting suits, but that's something he's been trying to rectify. According to a recent story, Spicer visited a D.C. franchise of NYC-based custom clothing company Book-A-Tailor to get some properly fitting suits. Unfortunately, and somewhat hilariously considering Trump's made-in-the-USA thumping, they were made in Thailand!… Although it did seem to help because in recent press briefings Spicer has looked less like a 13-year-old kid in his big brother's hand-me-downs. Obviously there are far more serious things to worry about than clothing style with this administration, but if the devil is in the details—and these guys obviously can't comprehend a detail as simple as a tie—then it's terrifying to think what they must be missing with something as complicated as health care or even nuclear war…”
    Thank you, Buzzard… Now onward to more important topics… Public Service Announcements (P.S.A.’s)… Calendars and pens at the ready… # 542 - Huevos Rancheros is now available every day at Lizbby’s Restaurant in Boonville. And chilaquiles quite often too - ya gotta like that!… #542 - Here is a message from Kathleen Michaels, art teacher at the local high school regarding today’s (March 15) special event at Lauren’s Restaurant in Boonville that accompanies the art show that will run at the restaurant from March 7 to April 23. “We are excited to invite you to join us for an opening reception for the exhibit of the Anderson Valley High School Photography Class ‘Finding Our Voice PhotoVoice Project’ on Wednesday, March 15, 3.45-5pm at Lauren’s restaurant. You will have an opportunity to view student photograph collections and artist statements/storylines from the project, as well as a presentation of the project by Photography Class students with healthy, light refreshments provided by Pennyroyal Farm”… #543 - The annual St Patrick’s Day Dinner to benefit the Senior Center will take place on Saturday, March 18 at the Apple Hall in the Fairgrounds in Boonville - for more details, see flyer somewhere near to this column… #544 - The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital have two visits this month to the Anderson Valley Farm Supply on Highway 128, north of Philo - from 2-3.30pm both tomorrow, Thursday March 16 and then again next week on March 23. To avoid a line perhaps turn up at around 3pm - you will definitely be seen. They will be also be here twice next month - April 13 and 20. New customers and their pets are always welcome and previous visitors should be aware that they can call 462-8833 and the vets will bring your pet’s charts with them - making this an even better service than it already is!… #545 - I believe that the Mendocino Bookmobile returns to the Valley next Tuesday, March 21. Phone 463-4694 for confirmation. They are usually here on alternate Tuesdays for 45 minutes at each of these places and times: Navarro Store 9am (for just 30 minutes before heading out to Comptche); the Floodgate 12.30pm; Philo 1.30pm; Boonville (Apple Hall) 2.30pm.… #546 - The A.V Museum is closed for the winter/spring… #547 - The monthly Barn Sales resume on Saturday/Sunday, April 1/2 - details to follow… #548 - Gardeners, Farmers and Produce Growers of all kinds, please remember Food Bank days (3rd Tuesday of every month) as a place to donate your extra produce.  It will be greatly appreciated.  The food bank has added new hours. They are always open from 8-10 am on the 3rd Tuesday of every month; they are also open on the Monday evening before, from 4-6. Please drop off on the Monday, behind Boonville Methodist Church.  If you need someone to glean your produce to take to the Food Bank, contact Valerie Kim at valerie.h.kim@gmail.com. Denisse Mattei is the Food Bank director. You can reach her at 895-3763… #549 - And last, but far from least, Natalie Matson, co-owner of Lauren’s Restaurant, will present her monthly ‘Sunday Supper’ on Sunday, March 26, from 5-8.30pm, featuring comfort dining in a cozy atmosphere at Lauren’s that will warm you inside and out - I can highly recommend the Shepherd’s pie,  (the real thing - with lamb not beef) - just one of many delicious meals Natalie will be presenting…   
    As a bonus P.S.A. here is the menu for the Community lunches over the next week in the Senior Center at the Veterans’ Building in Boonville. The Center asks for a $6 donation from seniors and charges $7 for Non-seniors… Tomorrow, Thursday, March 16, the lunch, served by Marti Titus and her crew at Noon, will be Cajun Sausage and Chicken pasta with Mississippi Mud Cake… Then, next Tuesday, March 21, the lunch will feature Steak Pizzola and Earthquake Cake for dessert. All meals include vegetables, salad bar, and fruit, plus milk, coffee, tea, and lemonade. What a deal - it maybe the best value for money you’ll get all week!… Tai Chi is now available every Tuesday at 11am, while on Thursdays at 11am it is Kathy’s Easy-stretch Yoga class. Also on Thursdays, the Active Life Club runs from 10am to 2pm and features games, crafts, and music. The Senior Center/Community Bus goes to Ukiah on Monday's and also Santa Rosa on the first Wednesday of the month. These trips fill up fast so don't forget to sign up early at 489-1175… Hopefully you will be able to attend some of these events and certainly the lunches and dinners, and remember – ALL ages are welcome! Hope to see you there…

    Moving quickly on to a few of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge – yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant (yet surprisingly reliable) Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley, a somewhat secret location that sees people get together and share their thoughts about life in Anderson Valley and often far beyond…
… A number of 3-Dot regulars attended the General Knowledge and Trivia Quiz held at Lauren’s Restaurant last Thursday evening and found themselves among a crowd of 44 contestants!  - one of the biggest turnouts for some time. The winners were ‘Everybody is Covered (a reference to the Trump administration’s claim for their proposed health insurance plans), a team that featured Valley dwellers Terry Ryder, Muriel Ellis, Bob Sites, Bob and Lydia of A.V. Valley Inn fame, and Mark Scaramella,… The runners-up were ‘The Flynn Creek Pot Holes’ who made the trip from their ‘homeland’  in Comptche and finished just one point behind the winners… There were 10 teams in total and it would appear that a fine time of eating, drinking, socializing, and brain exercising was had by all…
… Ron O’Brien’s ‘Celebration of Life’ took place at The Grange on Saturday with a wonderful turnout paying their resects to a very popular Valley man who had clearly affected the lives of many, particularly those on the local music scene… Mary O’Brien and friends put on a great event and you known that Ron was playing along merrily wherever he is…
… It’s that time of year… The local high school boys’ baseball began their season last week and play their first home game this Saturday (March 18) at 1pm against South Fork, while the girls’ softball team starts tomorrow at Technology H.S. in Rohnert Park, with their first home game next Tuesday (March 21) against the same opposition at 4pm… There’s nothing like the sound of bat-on-ball to get you in a spring state of mind…
… And staying with ‘school news,’ there is no truth whatsoever to the rumor that the school had a day off on Monday because it was thought that some teachers would have difficulty attending due the confusion of the introduction of daylight savings time the day before… (Hahaha - it’s a joke and, to many of us at the 3-Dot, quite an amusing one)…

    I’m outta here - I’ve got see a man about a sheep… Besides, that’s enough for now, so until we talk again – be careful out there; if you break a leg don’t come running to me; stay out of the ditches; be wary of strangers with more dogs than teeth; show love to your pets, they will be faithful and true to you to the last beat of their hearts, and please remember to keep your windows cracked if you leave them in your vehicle for any amount of time; think good thoughts; ‘Keep the Faith’; try to not let life get in the way of living; may your god go with you, and may your dog go with you too… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Sometimes poking, often stroking, but almost always humbly yours, Turkey Vulture - still wallowing very happily in the honor of having the 2nd tallest tree (343.6 feet) in Hendy Woods named after me and my ilk…
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at
p.p.s. Keep on humming, Hummingbird… Missing the Venerable Pheasant… On the sheep, Grace…
   

   

# 553 - 8th March, 2017

   Greetings one and all. Are you are sitting comfortably? Then I shall begin… First, I must point out that almost everything below is true, probably around 99% in fact. However, the whole truth is withheld because, as a wise Valley man known as Deekin' once said, “If I told you the whole truth then you’d be as smart as me”… I like your thinkin,’ Deekin’…

    First up this week - ‘This Trump Thing,’ or as it had been known for nearly 250 years up until now - The U.S. Presidency… To lose one close aide because of undeclared conversations with the Russian ambassador might be regarded as misfortune. To lose two would be careless, and in some minds, downright disgraceful. That is why Jeff Sessions, America’s attorney-general, probably won’t resign or be sacked—despite having misled Congress during confirmation hearings when he said plainly that he had not communicated with “the Russians” during the campaign. He has recused himself from an investigation into links between the Trump team and Russia, while maintaining that the answers he gave the Senate were “honest and correct as I understood at the time”. No one should expect a special prosecutor to be appointed to look into it. There is one person with the authority to launch such an investigation into the attorney-general: the attorney-general. His meetings with the ambassador may not have been untoward. But forgetting about them in a confirmation hearing was. In more normal times he would have gone already…

    Let’s move on with The Turkey Vulture’s ‘Evening Dining in the Valley Bulletin’… In geographical order, as you travel along on Highway 128, here are some fundamentals on a few of ‘The Tasty Eight’ that make up this culinary cruise through the Valley… Lauren’s Restaurant offers lunch from 11.30am-2.30pm on Thursday thru’ Sunday, and dinner from 5-9pm Tuesday - Saturday… Up next, also in downtown Boonville, we have Lizbby’s, the new Mexican Restaurant which is open every day except Tuesdays, serving breakfast (on Saturday and Sunday) and lunch from 10am-3pm and dinner from 5-8pm. I have been once and thoroughly enjoyed the Carnitas Plate but I am aware that a number of vocals have been disappointed to discover that there has been a shortage of Mexican offerings on the breakfast menu, in particular the Huevos Rancheros that many of us crave. Claws crossed that this is a temporary oversight… Staying in Boonville for two more eateries, currently not open… The Buckhorn is planning for a Monday, April 3 re-opening under its new ownership… And Aquarelle Cafe and Wine Bar is looking at an early April re-opening under the same, very relaxed ownership as before their extended trip to Baja! HaHa!… Stone and Embers has once again re-joined the Valley’s Evening Dining ‘team,’ with hours that see them open from Noon to 8pm Friday-Sunday and Noon to 4pm on Monday and Tuesday… The Bewildered Pig! down in the Deep End, is open Wednesday - Sunday, 5:30-9pm… And that’s the end of our journey along The Dining Highway for this week… Eat, drink, and be merry…
    Public Service Announcements (P.S.A.’s)… Calendars and pens at the ready… #542 - The annual St Patrick’s Day Dinner to benefit the Senior Center will take place on Saturday, March 18 at the Apple Hall in the Fairgrounds in Boonville… #543 - The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital have two visits this month to the Anderson Valley Farm Supply on Highway 128, north of Philo - on March 16 and 23. They will be also be here twice next month - April 13 and 20. New customers and their pets are always welcome and previous visitors should be aware that they can call 462-8833 and the vets will bring your pet’s charts with them - making this an even better service than it already is!… #544 - The ‘Preparation for the Rest of Our Lives’ group meets this coming Sunday afternoon, March 12, at Lauren’s Restaurant in Boonville, beginning at 4pm… #545 - The Boonville Farmers’ Market continues with its Winter location and hours at The Boonville General Store, on Saturdays from 11am-1pm. For more info, call Cindy at 895-2949… #546 - Need a burn permit? From 11am-3pm on Tuesdays, Wednesdays, and Fridays you can get one from the Firehouse in Boonville. Call 895-2020 for more information or stop by and you will be efficiently served with a smile - trust me on this… #547 - The A.V. Lending Library run by The Unity Club is open Tuesdays from 1.30-4.30pm and Saturdays 2-4pm at The Fairgrounds in Boonville… #548 - The County Dump is open from 9am-4pm Tuesday, Wednesday, Saturday, and Sunday. Dump Executive Director, Mike Mannix, rewards good customers with a star but will be very harsh with anyone thinking they can leave dead animals!…- #549 - The Anderson Valley Grange is having its regular second Sunday Pancake Breakfast on March 12 from 8.30-11am. Prices range from $5-10 - kids through hungry folks, for a delicious, locally-sourced breakfast. Choices include pancakes (gluten free available; gluten extra is not), eggs, and bacon, with a choice of juice, tea or coffee included… #550 - And finally this week, here is a message from Kathleen Michaels, teacher at the local high school, “We are excited to invite you to join us for the opening reception for the exhibit of the Anderson Valley High School Photography Class ‘Finding Our Voice PhotoVoice Project’ on Wednesday, March 15, 3.45-4.45pm at Lauren’s restaurant where you will have an opportunity to view student photograph collections and artist statements/storylines from the project, as well as a presentation of the project by Photography Class students with healthy, light refreshments provided by Pennyroyal Farm”…
    As a bonus P.S.A. here is the menu for the Community lunches and dinners over the next week in the Senior Center at the Veterans’ Building in Boonville. The Center asks for a $6 donation from seniors for both lunches and dinners and charges $7 for Non-seniors for lunches and $8 for the dinners… Tomorrow, Thursday, March 9, the lunch, served by Marti Titus and her crew at Noon, will be Minestrone Soup followed by Strawberry Yogurt Cake… Then, next Tuesday, March 14, the evening meal served at 6pm, will feature a Roast Beef dinner and then Bayou Brownies for dessert. All meals include vegetables, salad bar, and fruit, plus milk, coffee, tea, and lemonade. What a deal - it maybe the best value for money you’ll get all week! As this is the 2nd Tuesday of the month, the dinner will be followed by Bingo/Bunco at 7pm… Tai Chi is now available every Tuesday at 11am, while on Thursdays at 11am it is Kathy’s Easy-stretch Yoga class. Also on Thursdays, the Active Life Club runs from 10am to 2pm and features games, crafts, and music. The Senior Center/Community Bus goes to Ukiah on Monday's and also Santa Rosa on the first Wednesday of the month. These trips fill up fast so don't forget to sign up early at 489-1175… Hopefully you will be able to attend some of these events and certainly the lunches and dinners, and remember – ALL ages are welcome! Hope to see you there…

    Moving quickly on to a few of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge – yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant (yet surprisingly reliable) Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley, a somewhat secret location that sees people get together and share their thoughts about life in Anderson Valley and often far beyond…
… Not much happening this past week at the Three-Dot with many regulars deciding to stay at home… However, I did bump into a few of them and we shared a few very brief thoughts and insights… The annual Variety Show was just that - quite a variety (and that comment covers both the type of acts and their quality)… We all agreed - enough with the rain… We desperately need a pub/bar in town after six months without one… Is the local school district doing ok - I hear rumblings of discontent?… Obviously there is lots of water at this time, but I still would like to know - are any wineries taking water out of the creeks and rivers? I think we should be told… What I am told is that several ducks (?) have been spotted swimming in the huge pond (known amongst the regulars as ‘Bill Hill’s Hole’) next to the Balo Barn besides Highway 128, opposite Breggo Cellars, a couple of miles north of Boonville. I could not help myself from commenting that I hoped they had not mistakenly eaten any of the six-legged frogs that have apparently been spotted in the vicinity of that vast water hole and several other locations around the Valley. One of the regulars replied that the ducks could not have eaten any such frogs because there’s been no harmful pesticides sprayed anywhere around here that may result in such mutant creatures being formed. I felt I couldn’t possibly comment any further…
… From our 3-Dot regular, The Old Buzzard, comes another in his insightful series – ‘The Approach of the Apocalypse’… Buzzard reports, “I have nothing of interest to anyone to say at this point, so I will say nothing”… Why can’t more folks be like that?…

    Such creatures as those frogs mentioned above may be ugly and deformed to us, but as French philosopher Voltaire wisely pointed out, if you were to ask a male frog what beauty is “he will answer that it is a female with two great round eyes coming out of her little head, a large, wide, flat mouth, an extended belly, and a wrinkly brown back.” In other words, ‘beauty is in the eyes of the beholder’ – and that is your Quote of the Week. (Voltaire didn’t mention the six legs, you’ll notice)...

    I’m outta here - I’ve got see a man about a sheep… So until we talk again – be careful out there; if you break a leg don’t come running to me; stay out of the ditches; be wary of strangers with more dogs than teeth; show love to your pets, they will be faithful and true to you to the last beat of their hearts; think good thoughts; ‘Keep the Faith’; try to not let life get in the way of living; may your god go with you, and may your dog go with you too… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Sometimes poking, often stroking, but almost always humbly yours, Turkey Vulture - saddened but ultimately comforted in the knowledge that the old hare has safely moved to his new burrow in the sky…
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at
p.p.s. Keep on wagging that tail, Fred… Hi, Silver Swan – behaving yourself? Hopefully not!… Keep up the good work, Round-eyed Robin…

# 552 - 1st March, 2017

    Greetings one and all. Are you are sitting comfortably? Then I shall begin… First, I must point out that almost everything below is true, in fact probably around 99% of it is. However, the whole and complete truth is withheld because, as a wise Valley man known as Deekin once said, “If I told you the whole truth then you’d be as smart as me”… I like your thinkin,’ Deekin…
   
    The Trump Watch… The Department of Homeland Security introduced a major shift in immigration and border-security policy, issuing memos implementing a pair of Donald Trump’s executive orders. Whereas the Obama administration focused its deportation efforts on immigrants who had crossed the border recently or committed serious crimes, now almost anyone living in the country illegally is subject to removal. The Department of Homeland Security has published guidelines on implementing the president’s executive order cracking down on illegal immigrants, permitting many more than originally thought to be deported. They also include plans to send non-Mexicans to Mexico - let’s see how well that works out…

    Let’s move on with The Turkey Vulture’s ‘Evening Dining in the Valley Bulletin’… In geographical order, as you travel through the Valley on Highway 128, here are some fundamentals on ‘The Big Eight’… Lauren’s Restaurant offers lunch from 11.30am-2.30pm on Thursday thru’ Sunday, and dinner from 5-9pm Tuesday - Saturday… Lizbby’s, the new Mexican Restaurant in downtown Boonville is open every day except Tuesdays, serving breakfast (on Saturday and Sunday) and lunch from 10am-3pm and dinner from 5-8pm… The Buckhorn is seriously considering a Monday, April 3 re-opening under its new ownership. I am not sure of their full opening hours as yet (they will probably be closed on Tuesdays) but after being closed for six months one hopes they are plentiful… The Boonville Hotel continues with their family-style, prix fixe menu served Friday thru’ Sunday… Aquarelle Cafe and Wine Bar has delayed their planned re-opening for now. Perhaps in the next couple of weeks is a positive thought I am entertaining…  The Redwood Drive-In just keeps on doing what they do with reliable hours - try the donuts!… Stone and Embers has once again re-joined the Valley’s Evening Dining ‘team’ with new hours that see them open from Noon to 8pm Friday-Sunday and Noon to 4pm on Monday and Tuesday… The Bewildered Pig! down in the Deep End, is open Wednesday - Sunday, 5:30-9pm…

    Public Service Announcements (P.S.A.’s)… Calendars and pens at the ready… #545 - The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital have two visits this month to the Anderson Valley Farm Supply on Highway 128, north of Philo - on March 16 and 23… They will be also be here twice next month - April 13 and 20… #546 - I believe that the Mendocino Bookmobile returns to the Valley next Tuesday, March 7. Phone 463-4694 for confirmation. They are usually here on alternate Tuesdays for 45 minutes at each of these places and times: Navarro Store 9am (for just 30 minutes before heading out to Comptche); the Floodgate 12.30pm; Philo 1.30pm; Boonville (Apple Hall) 2.30pm.… #547 - The A.V Museum is closed for the winter/early spring… #548 - No more Barn Sales for another month or so…
    As a bonus P.S.A. here is the menu for the Community lunches over the next week in the Senior Center at the Veterans’ Building in Boonville. The Center asks for a $6 donation from seniors and charges $7 for Non-seniors… Tomorrow, Thursday, March 2, the lunch, served by Marti Titus and her crew at Noon, will be Meat Loaf, Mashed potatoes and gravy, with Birthday Cookies for dessert… Then, next Tuesday, March 7th, the lunch will feature Chicken Picatta and Lemon Bundt cake for dessert. All meals include vegetables, salad bar, and fruit, plus milk, coffee, tea, and lemonade. What a deal - it maybe the best value for money you’ll get all week!… Tai Chi is now available every Tuesday at 11am, while on Thursdays at 11am it is Kathy’s Easy-stretch Yoga class. Also on Thursdays, the Active Life Club runs from 10am to 2pm and features games, crafts, and music. The Senior Center/Community Bus goes to Ukiah on Monday's and also Santa Rosa on the first Wednesday of the month. These trips fill up fast so don't forget to sign up early at 489-1175… Hopefully you will be able to attend some of these events and certainly the lunches and dinners, and remember – ALL ages are welcome! Hope to see you there…

    Moving quickly on to a few of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge – yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant (yet surprisingly reliable) Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley, a somewhat secret location that sees people get together and share their thoughts about life in Anderson Valley and often far beyond, and where we subscribe to the Winston Churchill philosophy that “A lie will get halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to put on its pants”… So, with that in mind, I shall quickly put my pants on and continue…
… A few of our regulars attended Natalie’s Sunday Supper at Lauren’s Restaurant last weekend and informed me that it was a lovely candlelit dining experience with the big hits being Shepherd’s Pie (featuring some delicious lamb) and the Fried Chicken and mashed potatoes; the clam chowder was highly acclaimed too… Well done to Natalie Matson (Lauren’s co-owner) and her crew, I shall certainly be there for the next such event on Sunday, March 26th - I suggest you mark it on your calendars now!…
… The past weekend’s Alsace festival was a big success also, I am reliably informed, with a crowd that is a “little less likely to drink so much” as the attendees at the Pinot Festival in May… Both a good and bad thing I would suggest…
… This weekend the Variety Show returns for the 26th year and there is no doubt it will be a sellout on both Friday and Saturday… It is not everyone’s ‘cup of tea’ but as Master of Ceremonies, Captain Rainbow (formerly Corporal Raindrop), will tell you, “As long as people realize it is a ‘variety’ show and not necessarily (but often in many cases) a talent show, then a good time is usually had by all.” Anyway, congratulations to The Rainman and all his fellow-Varieteers on their twenty-sixth production - a show ‘by the people, for the people’ and a great Valley night out...
… A lively discussion was had among the regulars about the carrying of guns by law enforcement officers. All major police forces in Europe, as well as the US, Canada and Australia routinely carry firearms. The exceptions, apart from in special circumstances, are Britain, the Irish Republic and New Zealand, and in Norway officers carry arms in their cars but not on their person. It is illegal for citizens in those countries to own guns so I guess that keeps it pretty ‘fair’… The debate continues…
… From our 3-Dot regular, The Old Buzzard, comes another in his insightful series – ‘Signs that the Apocalypse is Approaching’… Buzzard reports, “To the uninitiated, 40-odd cars buzzing around a four-cornered track for 500 miles—nearly the length of France—might seem dull. But the skillful drivers are to be admired while some fans are enticed by the prospect of a 200mph crash, the punch-ups between competitors, and beery pre-race barbeques. The 2017 season began this past weekend at Daytona Beach, where NASCAR was founded in 1948, transforming the dirt-track races of bootleggers’ souped-up cars into an organised sport. The franchise has become a behemoth, with Fox and NBC together paying $8.2bn for a decade’s broadcasting rights to 2024. But interest is waning. Diehard supporters complain about the cost of traveling to events and the constant tinkering with the rules. Organizers have torn seats out of stadiums to hide falling attendance numbers. Television audiences, which skew towards older viewers, have fallen by 45% since 2005. The sport, it would seem, is running out of juice, and for many folks that would most certainly mean that the Apocalypse is fast approaching…”
   
    Interesting stuff, Buzzard… Ok, I’m outta here - I’ve got see a man about a sheep… So, until we talk again - be careful out there; if you break a leg don’t come running to me; stay out of the ditches; be wary of strangers with more dogs than teeth; show love to your pets, they will be faithful and true to you to the last beat of their hearts; think good thoughts; ‘Keep the Faith’; try to not let life get in the way of living; may your god go with you, and may your dog go with you too… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Sometimes poking, often stroking, but almost always humbly yours, Turkey Vulture and thinking you should now that we Turkey Vultures are monogamous and mate for life and sometimes, to prove our loyalty, we like to indulge in an ‘erotic’ display dance on our nesting grounds…
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at
p.p.s. Keep on humming, Hummingbird… Missing the Venerable Pheasant… On the sheep, Grace…