# 304 - April 25th, 2012

Greetings one and all - if you are sitting comfortably then I shall begin... And what better start than to mention the excellent event that I attended on Sunday at the Navarro Winery as part of the movement to ‘Save Hendy Woods State Park’! A crowd over 200 (about 70% local) gathered to enjoy fine food and wine, live music, a silent auction, and an afternoon of socializing with like-minded friends and acquaintances, all with the common goal of keeping the park open. Those in attendance included Supervisor Dan Hamburg, former candidate for Supervisor Wendy Roberts, the off-duty County Sheriff Tom Allman, and a range of Valley folks from many, yet not all, of the Valley’s ‘walks of life.’ The organizers and volunteers put on a memorable and well-organized event and should be heartily congratulated. These include (with apologies to those whom I forget): Kathy Bailey, Sophie Otis, Lauren Keating, Linda MacElwee, Nikola Milosevich, Pam Laird, Roy Laird, Eric Labowitz, Keevon Labowitz, Cyd Bernstein, Janet Anderson, Anne Duvigneaud, Mimi Duvigneaud, Deanna Apfel, Judy Long, Ellen Saxe, and Julia and Pat on the bar; with bbq cooks – Steve Anderson, Rob Giuliani, and Jean Duvigneaud; servers George and Kate Castagnola, Joe Petelle, Linnea Totten, David Ballantine, and Torrey Douglass; silent auction coordinators: Monica Landry, Mike Reilly, Xenia King, and Margaret Pickens; Hendy Woods film-makers: Heidi Knott and Leah Collins; parking guys: Felipe Mendoza and the Navarro Winery crew; and last but most certainly not least, the very generous hosts at the winery – Ted Bennett and Deborah Cahn, with son and daughter, Aaron and Sarah. On behalf of the towering trees and the thousands of people who hope to continue to enjoy their majesty – ‘Many thanks to one and all!” 

For your Quotes of the Week I must inevitably turn to some that have trees as their subject matter… Let’s start with this from Rabindranath Tagore (1861-1941) the Indian Bengali prophet and literary figure who said, “Trees are the Earth’s endless effort to speak to the listening heaven”… And how about these words from American poet Lucy Larcom (1824-1893) – “He who plants a tree plants hope”… Of course there are always those less enlightened figures who have to say something stupid and narrow-minded, and one of those is most certainly former U.S. President Ronald Reagan, whose resurgent popularity in recent times can only be regarded as a mystery and indicative of how short society’s collective memory can be. Anyway, this is what ‘The Great Communicator’(??) famously and unforgivingly once said, “If you’ve seen one redwood tree, you’ve seen them all” – what a clown!... We must end the quotes on a positive note, so here are three such comments on the almighty tree… First some wise words from William Cullen Bryant (1794-1878), the American romantic poet, journalist, and long-time editor of the New York Evening Post, who observed, “Groves of trees were God’s first temples”… Next is this from Seneca the Elder (28B.C.- 39A.D.), the Roman rhetorician and writer, who said, “When you enter a grove peopled with ancient trees, higher than the ordinary, and shutting out the sky with their thickly inter-twined branches, do not the stately shadows of the wood and the stillness of the place strike you with the presence of a deity?”… And finally, from Kahlil Gibran (1883-1931), the Lebanese-American artist, poet, philosopher, come these words, which I believe perfectly sum up the need to keep Hendy Woods open for one and all, ““Trees are poems that the earth writes upon the sky”…… 

Public Service Announcements… Calendars and pens at the ready... #114 - the annual A.V. Theatre Guild production, under the directorship of Marcus Magdalena, begins its two weekend run this coming Friday and Saturday. This year’s play is ‘Cocktails with Mimi’, ‘a comedy for all ages’ featuring a dozen talented local thespians. It will run for two consecutive weekends, Friday and Saturday, April 27/28 and May 4/5 at The Grange with a curtain at 7pm every night. Oh, and there’s Alicia’s delicious tacos available before the show and during the intermission at every performance!… #115 – The Barn Sale returns on the final weekend of the month for the first time in 2012. This will take place at The Big Barn at The St. Elizabeth Seton Catholic Church Refectory on A.V. Way, just north of Boonville, from 9am to 3pm on both Saturday and Sunday, April 28 and 29. And the always enjoyable Bar-b-q will be open on the Sunday!… #116 – The A.V. Unity Club presents its Annual Wildflower Show at The Fairgrounds in Boonville this coming Saturday and Sunday, April 28 and 29 from 10am to 4pm each day. It is fun and free! Call Robyn at 895-2609 for further details… 

Moving quickly on to a few of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge - yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley where people gather and share their thoughts about Valley life... … 

... A number of our local regulars were very pleased to hear that Steve Sparks will shortly be resuming his ‘Lives and Times of Valley Folks’ series of interviews, the first of which will appear in this newspaper in May. After doing 146 of these in 155 weeks, Steve took a few months off and now feels reinvigorated enough to get going once again. He tells me he has many names on his list of potential interviewees and it is just a matter of getting people to agree to do them. He also asks for any suggestions and wants to assure all subjects that they always have the final word on what appears in print… … 

... Many regulars and I were full of praise for the special lunch put on by Lauren and her staff at the restaurant in Boonville last Thursday from 1pm to 3pm. The guests were primarily Valley innkeepers/lodging owners and winery owners/managers, who were all treated to a delicious and eclectic feast featuring the many dishes on Lauren’s menu. With wine also provided and a fun atmosphere of ‘meeting and greeting’ I imagine the already symbiotic relationship between Lauren’s Restaurant and the Valley’s various hosts would have been strengthened even more… ... 

... As you may already know, this month’s Guest Chef Dinner at the Senior Center on Friday 27th has sold out. The next one is on June 1st with Maple Creek Winery’s Tom Rodrigues as the Guest. I shall keep you informed about the menu and ticket details but this too will sell out, I’m sure… 

… Talking of the Dinner this Friday, I shall not be in attendance as I plan to be at the opening night of the Theater Guild’s play. A tough decision but Hummingbird is involved in the play and so that’s where I’ll be. Even though the dining event was sold out, the Signal Ridge Quail and her flock had arranged to provide me with a dinner but now this means that the lovely gesture has to be declined. Nevertheless, it was much appreciated anyway… 

... A couple of disgruntled high school students swung by the 3-Dot for after school snacks and a few beers, sorry ice teas, and were bemoaning the fact that the ‘lunchtime lockdown’ was still in effect at the school. You may recall that following a ‘fight club’ lunchtime episode a few months ago, the whole student body is not permitted to leave the school during the lunch break. The rumor is that this will be continued into the next school year too and this is creating even more dissatisfaction on campus. It does seem a little excessive wouldn’t you say?... 

 I’m outta here; so, until we talk again - ‘Keep the Faith’; be careful out there; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; and may your god go with you… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Humbly yours, Turkey Vulture... p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at p.p.s. Hi, Silver Swan – behaving yourself? Hopefully not! p.p.p.s. Get well soon, Jamal

# 303 - April 18th, 2012

Greetings one and all - if you are sitting comfortably then I shall begin… Having a little dentist work is generally not the most pleasant of experiences but last week I had a check-up, talon polishing, and beak cleaning from the dentist located at the A.V. Medical Center and was very pleasantly surprised indeed. There was no wait, everyone was very friendly, and the care was very professional. In fact there is no need at all to think you have to go all the way to Ukiah or Santa Rosa for your dentistry work - these guys know what they are doing. If you need a dentist or are looking to change from your present one, then I suggest you sign up with them as your dentist of choice - this will certainly help to ensure that we continue to have such a facility here in the Valley…
And with this topic in mind, I have managed to come up with some Quotes of the Week on the unusual topic of dentists… First we have these words from advice columnist Ann Landers who said, “Blessed are they who hold lively conversations with the helplessly mute, for they shall be called dentists”… The there is this classic from an unknown source – “You know, sometimes a man just can't satisfy all of a woman's desires. Which is why God invented dental floss”… And finally we have this comment from Joseph Heller (1923 - 1999), the American satirical novelist, short story writer, and playwright whose best-known work is Catch-22 - “We do have a zeal for laughter in most situations, give or take a dentist”…
Onward… Public Service Announcements… Calendars and pens at the ready... #130 - The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital will return to the Valley tomorrow, Thursday, April 19th when they will be at The A.V. Farm Supply from 2-3.30pm on each occasion. They have asked me to inform you that you do not have to arrive early and then wait a long time - everyone showing up at anytime before 3.30pm will be seen. And while you are there, why not make a purchase or two at the Farm Supply, whose continued support for this service is the main reason we have it on our doorstep… #131 - In my absence the monthly Grange Groove has returned to, where else, The Grange on Hwy 128. It’s the 3rd Friday of the month – April 20th, and is a ‘free-dance for all’ from 8pm on, featuring dancing and gyrating to the sounds of D.J. Jeanine. This is a family fun evening that is drug and alcohol free - but I’m sure it’s still lots of fun! (I’m kidding!)..... #132 – The next fundraiser in support of the Save Hendy Woods movement will be held this coming Sunday, April 22nd, at Navarro Vineyards on Hwy 128, The event, featuring a bbq, Navarro wines, a silent auction, and live music, will go from noon to 3pm with tickets available via www.hendywoods.org. All proceeds will go toward keeping Hendy Woods open. For further questions contact Navarro Vineyards at 895-3686… #133 – KZYX & Z, our local community supported public radio station, begin their week long Spring Pledge Drive on Sunday April 22nd – call 895-2324 for further details or to make a pledge… #134 – And finally this week, a note that the annual A.V. Theatre Guild production is just around the corner. Under the directorship of Marcus Magdalena, this year’s production is ‘Cocktails with Mimi’, ‘a comedy for all ages’ that will feature a fine cast of local thespians. It will run on two consecutive weekends, Friday and Saturday, April 27th/28th and May 4th/5th at The Grange, with the curtain at 7pm on each of those evenings…
Moving quickly on to a few of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge - yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley where people gather and share their thoughts about Valley life...
... Are there three more friendly and efficient post office workers anywhere? I’m referring to Joe Dresch, Sheila Hibbs, and Ann Carr who continue to work their ‘magic’ at the Philo P.O. When I put this question to a few of the 3-Dot regulars it was wholeheartedly agreed that they didn’t think there could be…
... Many regulars were disappointed to hear that the first in this year’s Guest Chef Dinner evenings at the Senior Center had already sold out - three weeks before the event! This special event will be on Friday, April 27th when the guest chef will be Marilyn Pronsolino who will be presenting her famous homemade ravioli from the secret family recipe. Beer and wine is available but I’m afraid none of the sixty tickets remain. The next such evening is on Friday, June 1st when Maple Creek Winery’s Tom Rodrigues will be the featured Guest Chef. Get your tickets early by calling 895-3609 – once again, there will only be sixty sold…
… So bud-break has arrived in the vineyards so now, with frosty nights still occurring, we have to put up with the ridiculously loud ‘helicopter-like fly-overs’ that some winery’s warming fans sound like to anyone living anywhere within a mile or so of such businesses. He could have been pulling my claw, I suppose, but one regular told me that certain wineries are providing a complimentary bottle of wine and free ear-plugs to those who go in and complain that they simply cannot sleep through the noise. That’s quite a kind gesture, although I must say it would be rude of them not to…
... From our 3-Dot regular, The Old Buzzard, comes another in his insightful series - ‘The Approach of the Apocalypse’... Buzzard reports, “Not for the first time and probably not for the last, the ignorance of some of our politically correct friends has surfaced as they eagerly try to tell the rest of us how to behave and speak. Once and for all let me inform the uninformed that, according to any dictionary you may wish to refer to, the word ‘niggardly’ is an adjective of Scandinavian origin that may be used to describe someone who is ‘not generous or mean.’ Got that? It is not the racial slur that certain self-righteous people immediately assume it to be in their clamor to accuse others of being ignorant. A little enlightenment and social awareness is one thing, but at this point in time I’m quite convinced that the levels of political correctness that this country has risen/ fallen to are as sure a sign as any that the Apocalypse cannot be far off”…
Oh, dear, I suppose I should get my coat and leave… Meanwhile, until we talk again – Please don’t be niggardly and buy me a beer or glass of wine next time you see me out on the town; ‘Keep the Faith’; be careful out there; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; and may your god go with you… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Humbly yours, Turkey Vulture...
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at
p.p.s. On the sheep, Grace...
p.p.p.s. Get well soon, Jamal…

# 302 - April 11th, 2012

Greetings one and all - if you are sitting comfortably then I shall begin... Well, good readers, it’s good to be back from the ‘real world’! Following my mysterious disappearance (that I could not possibly comment upon) I have returned to The Nest and I’m once again fully energized and ready to observe and comment. …
And talking about ‘mysterious disappearances’, one of the more unsettling ones was that of Valley resident, Jamal Essayah (a personal friend of mine), who two weeks ago, for reasons that were unclear, cancelled his cell phone and Facebook account and simply disappeared, curtailing all contact with family and friends. Once this became apparent, many Valley folks were very concerned, knowing him to be a very well adjusted, competent, and gifted young man. Finally, over a week later, news of his disappearance was posted on Facebook and as a result many more people far and wide were adding their concern. Fortunately, their very worst fears were relieved last Friday when it was reported that he was alive, but had been in a road accident in Redding, California and was recovering in hospital. Although his behavior had been erratic at the time of this incident, and the reasons behind his actions remain unclear, his life was not in danger and the Valley could breathe a collective sigh of relief... ‘Get well soon, Jamal – your many friends in the Valley have you in their thoughts for a speedy and complete recovery’...
As I zoomed around the Valley this past week, catching up on Valley affairs and people, perhaps my most enjoyable experience was at The A.V. Lions Club Easter Breakfast and Egg Hunt held at The Apple Hall in the Fairgrounds in Boonville on Sunday morning to benefit the F.F.A. and High School Ag class. There was an excellent turnout of Valley folks who no doubt enjoyed the splendid breakfast presented by the Lions’ Cooking Crew of Judy Long, Derek Wyatt and wife Nicole Johnson, Renée and Kevin Lee, Patty Liddy, Christy Reilly, Bob Sites, and Robin Harper, plus assistance from Fair Board member, Morgan Baynham. With Lions’ President, Christine Clark, overseeing the event, Terry Ryder and mother Muriel producing the Easter baskets for the raffle, Joanne Clark on the door, and the cheerful and hard-working volunteers from Beth Swehla’s F.F.A. group and A.V.H.S. Ag Class, the event was a big success - and that’s without even mentioning the delicious food. This was so good that I was a little greedy and unable to partake in the ensuing egg hunt! Yes, it was what I would call a ‘classic’ Valley occasion – all sorts of people, young and old, coming together for the common good – yer gotta like that!...
Public Service Announcements… Calendars and pens at the ready... #255 – The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital will return to the Valley on two more occasions this month – tomorrow, Thursday, April 12th and again next week on the 19th, from 2-3.30pm on each occasion. They have asked me to inform you that you do not have to arrive early and then wait a long time - everyone showing up at anytime before 3.30pm will be seen... #256 – the Winter Market continues its weekly ‘show’ at the Boonville General Store on Saturday from 10.30am to 1pm, featuring locally made foods and crafts... #257 – The A.V. Grange has its monthly meeting next Tuesday, April 15th. This is the best time to become a new member as throughout April you will receive a year’s free membership! The evening also features a potluck competition with prizes. Call Don at 2214 for details...
Moving quickly on to a couple of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge - yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley where people gather and share their thoughts about Valley life...
... A hearty congratulations are offered by the 3-Dot regulars to Antonia Perez who last week received her U.S. citizenship. It is no exaggeration to say that with all her hard work for the schools and at many Valley social functions, she has been regarded as a wonderful ‘citizen’ for many years...
... Regulars were pleased to have heard through the sports grapevine that Youth Soccer is to be resurrected here in the Valley. Thanks to the efforts of Elementary School Principal, Donna Pierson-Pugh, among others, there are plans to field three or four teams this fall, providing a much-needed outlet for the youngsters aged between 7 and 12 who have greatly missed playing ‘the beautiful game’ over the past year or so...
... One topic under discussion at the 3-Dot this past week was ‘Jobs we would hate to do’ and I surprised some regulars with my choice of air steward. Having spent time on many long haul flights I am convinced that this line of work is not at all the glamorous occupation that it’s frequently depicted as. You are dealing with a grumpy and frequently overly demanding public and basically you are a waiter/waitress in a very cramped restaurant serving quite poor food. So job seekers, trust me on this – you can thank me later…
Talking of traveling, for your Quotes of the Week here are three of my favorites on this subject. First up it’s these words from Richard Burton (1925 - 1984) the Welsh actor nominated seven times for an Academy Award (without ever winning) who said, “Travelers, like poets, are mostly an angry race”… And then there is this comment from Paul Theroux (1941 - ?) the American travel writer and novelist – “Travel is glamorous only in retrospect”… Finally, how about this from Oscar Wilde (1854 - 1900) the Irish writer and poet who typically remarked, “I never travel without my diary. One should always have something sensational to read on one’s travels!”…
Finally this week, I must just comment on a letter I received a few weeks ago regarding my critical remarks about those who attend charity events and bring their own food, in this particular case the A.V. Film Festival. The author of the note defended his/her actions and stated that I was part of a ‘group of people who look down on brown-baggers, seeing them as some sort of cheapskates’. Err, when people attend charity functions with their own food then yes I do, and why would I think otherwise? Please don’t tell me that a $2 taco or $1 cookie was too expensive for anyone. It is not. With films offered all-day long for just $7 in total, quality food and drink on sale for very reasonable prices, and every penny of profit going to local charities, calling them ‘cheapskates’ is being very polite I’d say. In fact ‘Tight-fisted, miserly buggers’ is more along the lines of what I really think. (I’d use the word ‘niggardly’ but that would be far too controversial for those unfamiliar with this word who are not inclined to look it up in a dictionary)…
Well now I think it’s time to take my leave. So, until we talk again - ‘Keep the Faith’; be careful out there; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; and may your god go with you… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Humbly yours, Turkey Vulture...
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at
p.p.s. Hi, Silver Swan – behaving yourself? Hopefully not!

# 301 - March 7th, 2012

Greetings one and all - if you are sitting comfortably then I shall begin... I am going to be on ‘special assignment’ for the next few weeks so this column will either be very brief or non-existent during that time. I’d let you know what this ‘assignment’ is all about except it’s top secret so if I did tell you I’d have to kill you for your own safety...
Fortunately, before my departure the Senior Center held their Board elections last week and so I am able to report the results. They were as followed – Re-elected to the Board were Vice-President Steve Sparks and board member Patrick Ford, and to replace the recently resigned Loretta Houck and Linda Boudoures there were two new members elected – Cory Morse and Chris Rossi... Board members not up for election at this time were President Sheri Hansen, Eddie Pardini, and Fal Allen...
Public Service Announcements… Calendars and pens at the ready... #252 – There are new-laid eggs at the A.V.High School Ag. Department and at $3.50 a dozen for delicious ‘real’ eggs it’s a great deal. Teacher Beth Swehla reports that “the 'girls' are ramping up their production, so keep us in mind. Call 707-895-2514 and come by”... #253 – The Variety Show is this coming weekend, 7pm curtain on both March 9th and 10th... #254 - Next Tuesday, March 13th, is the second Tuesday of the month and that means ‘Dinner and Bingo Night’ at the Senior Center – good food, beer and wine, top quality bingo with prizes, and, as you know by now - you don’t have to be a senior to attend!... #255 – The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital will return to the Valley once again on March 15th and then in April on three occasions - the 5th, 12th and 19th...
Moving quickly on to a few of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge - yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley where people gather and share their thoughts about Valley life... Here’s a quick summary of the topics discussed over the past week or so...
... A happy customer at the A.V. Farm Supply was made even happier when owners Dave and Nancy Gowan told him their cash till was $20 over on the day he had shopped there and they returned it to him. They knew it was him following a purchase of alfalfa hay. Yer gotta like that!... Update on former One Horse Espresso coffee shop owner and Senior Center cook, Natalie Matson and family (husband Clay and young sons Spike (now 3 years old) and King (nine months) – they have moved on from Chicago. where they were for six months or so, and now Clay has found his dream job as the Main Barn Manager at a highly regarded Thoroughbred Horse ranch in Maryland. Natalie is studying for a degree on-line while working at the Spike and King ‘factory’... Cheapest gas in Boonville hit $4.79 gallon last week... Have a friend who likes to read and with a birthday coming up? Then check out the great t-shirts now available at Laughing Dog Books...
And with reading and books on my mind let’s have a couple of relevant Quotes of the Week... Well first up it’s the famous anti-reader, Chairman Mau Tse-Tung (1893-1976), the Chinese Communist revolutionary, Marxist political philosopher, and leader of the Chinese Revolution, who said, “To read too many books is harmful”... Then there is the far more enlightened view from Baron de Montesquiue (1689-1755), generally referred to as simply Montesquieu, the French social commentator and political thinker who commented, “I have never known any distress that an hour’s reading did not relieve”... And finally, from Oscar Wilde (1854-1900) the Irish writer, poet, and great wit, let’s go with, “There is no such thing as a moral or an immoral book. Books are well written or badly written. That is all?”...
Well now I think it’s time to take my leave. So, until we talk again - ‘Keep the Faith’; be careful out there; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; and may your god go with you… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Humbly yours, Turkey Vulture...
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at
p.p.s. Hi, Silver Swan – behaving yourself? Hopefully not!