# 456 - 29th April, 2015

    Greetings one and all – if you are sitting comfortably then I shall begin…. Let’s start with these important Public Service Announcements (P.S.A.’s)…
    Calendars and pens at the ready… #810 - The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital have two upcoming confirmed dates of when they will be in the Valley - tomorrow, Thursday, April 30 and then again in two weeks on Thursday, May 14… #811 - The Barn Sale returns in less than two weeks time for its usual spring, summer, and fall run after a four-month hiatus. This takes place at The St. Elizabeth Seton Catholic Church Refectory on A.V. Way just north of Boonville from 9am to 3pm on both Saturday and Sunday, May 2 and 3… #812 - The Mendocino Bookmobile returns to the Valley on Tuesday, May 5. They are here on alternate Tuesdays for 45 minutes at each of these places and times: Navarro Store 9am (for just 30 minutes); the Floodgate 12.30pm; Philo 1.30pm; Boonville (Apple Hall) 2.30pm. Phone 463-4694 for further details… #813 - The A.V Museum continues its spring hours of Saturday and Sunday, from 1pm-4pm. Situated in The Little Red Schoolhouse next to the Elementary School on A.V. Way, this is a perfect thing to do in the Valley when you have a couple of hours spare on a weekend afternoon. It is not without reason that it is generally regarded as ‘The Best Little Museum in the West’… #814 - Need a burn permit? You can get one from the Firehouse in Boonville. Call 895-2020 for details or stop by - you will be efficiently served with a smile - trust me on this…   
    As a bonus P.S.A. here is the menu for the Community lunches over the next week at the Senior Center at the Veterans’ Building in Boonville. The Center asks for a $6 donation from seniors and charges $7 for Non-seniors… Tomorrow, Thursday, April 30, the lunch, served by Marti Titus and her crew at Noon, will be Moroccan chicken stew, Sweet potatoes, couscous, pomegranate, quinoa salad, and grasshopper squares for dessert… Then, next Tuesday, May 5, lunch  will feature Meatloaf, mashed potatoes, gravy rolls, carrots, Bulgar spinach salad, and Birthday cupcakes. All meals include vegetables, salad bar, and fruit, plus milk, coffee, tea, and lemonade. What a deal - it maybe the best $7 you’ll spend all week! Hopefully you will be able to attend, and remember – ALL ages are welcome! Hope to see you there… 

    Moving quickly on to a few of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge – yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant (yet surprisingly reliable) Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley, a somewhat secret location that sees people get together and share their thoughts about life in Anderson Valley and often far beyond, and where we subscribe to the Winston Churchill philosophy that “A lie will get halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to put on its pants”… So, with that in mind, I’ll put my pants on and continue…
… No more frosts?… Does this mean the postponement of the rumored sabotage attacks on the wineries’ frost protection fans? Can someone let me know, please?…
… Many 3-Dot regulars attended last weekend’s Goat Festival and Wildflower Show and, while there were a few hiccups at this inaugural event, there is no doubt that the Goat Fest was well-received and has great potential. Several competitions took place along with various animal husbandry displays among the various vendors of food and drinks, including the always reliable beer and wine bar provided by the A.V. Lions. The Goat Parade was won by Annie Goatly and her appropriately named goat, The Goat; the Goat Calling did not result in a clear winner as neither of the two goats - Dagwood and Zelda, moved a single inch towards any one of the ten competitors calling them from the other side of the pen; the Goat Milking was a success however, won by Deputy Sheriff Craig Walker whose handiwork produced the most milk from Licorice the goat - Craig beat out the other ‘celebrity’ milkers - local doctor Logan McGhan and High School Principal Michelle Hutchins; and the Birria cook-off featured six offerings, each of which had many pus points. The winner was Tim Ward of the Anderson Valley Community Farm, who very narrowly edged out Ricardo from The Redwood Drive-In for the top prize… It was a fine afternoon hopefully enjoyed by all - ‘Well done’ to Jim Devine, Cindy Wilder, Valerie Adair, and the many others who helped  in the event’s organizing and presentation. See you next year!…
… The art exhibit featuring drawings and paintings by Kyllikki ‘Kay’ Clark at the Scharffenberger Cellars tasting room is soon to end its run. Thursday, May 14 is the last day in fact. Kay, a native of Finland, grew up in World War 2 and lived in the Valley for many years, drawing her inspiration for these works from her early life in war-torn Finland, nature, and wildlife. All proceeds go to A.V. Arts Scholarship Fund to further student studies in the visual, performing, and literary arts…
… Perhaps all the constructive criticism has worked? I am talking about the Chamber of Commerce Events' Calendar that for too long has been referred to around the Valley rather unfortunately as - 'one of the Valley’s best kept secrets,’ or even worse, in this column, as ‘not worth looking at’… I am now very pleased to announce that there is work afoot to change this, and those involved are to be congratulated for doing so. Look for the changes to happen soon, particularly the events attracting visitors to the Valley, while the all-encompassing version of the wide range of all Valley events will take a little longer to compile… Meanwhile, you should know that the current list of Senior center Lunches on the current calendar is incorrect - as regular readers of this column will be well aware, the second and final Tuesdays are not lunches - they are dinners beginning at 6pm; with the dinner on the second Tuesday being followed by Bingo at 7pm… Now you know, again……

    Oh, dear, have I upset somebody? Surely not because of my expectation that folks might do what they say they will do - even if they are volunteers… Oh, well, I’ll get my coat and leave... Besides, I’ve got see a man about a sheep… So, until we talk again – ‘Keep the Faith’; be careful out there; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; be wary of strangers with more dogs than teeth; please remember to keep your windows cracked if you have pets in your vehicle; and may your god go with you… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Sometimes poking, often stroking, but almost always humbly yours, Turkey Vulture, thinking you should now that we Turkey Vultures are monogamous and mate for life and sometimes, to prove our loyalty, we like to indulge in an ‘erotic’ display dance on our nesting grounds…
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at
p.p.s. Skylark – read any good books lately?.. Keep on humming, Hummingbird… Everything cool with you, O.J.? Of course it is…

# 455 - 22nd April, 2015

   Greetings one and all – if you are sitting comfortably then I shall begin… I’m tired and not really in the mood for the usual wit and repartee… So let’s get straight into the Public Service Announcements (P.S.A.’s)…
    Calendars and pens at the ready… # 933 - The Goat Fest and Wildflower Show will take place this Saturday, April 25 at the Mendocino County Fairgrounds in Boonville, with the Wildflower Show continuing the next day also. The event will feature a full day of Family Fun, Goat Education, and Goat Celebration and, along with such fun events as ‘Best Dressed Goat Contest’ and a ‘Celebrity Goat Milking Competition,’ there is also a schedule of workshops on two themes:  Goat Dairy Products and Goat Husbandry. There will also be a Birria (goat stew) Cook-Off, a Zumba-thon, and a dance at The Apple Hall in the evening with Dean Titus, Susan Clark, and the Bootjack 5. For more information go to avgoats@gmail.com; or Facebook at Anderson Valley Goat Fest; or call King Goat, Jim Devine, at (707) 496-8725… #934 - The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital have two upcoming confirmed dates when they will be in the Valley - a week from tomorrow, on April 30, and then again on May 14. As usual, the venue and time is the A.V. Farm Supply from 2-4pm and new customers are always welcome. Previous visitors should be aware that they can call 462-8833 and the vets will bring your pet’s charts with them - making this an even better service than it already is!… #935 - The Barn Sale returns in less than two weeks time for its usual spring, summer, and fall run after a four-month hiatus. This takes place at The St. Elizabeth Seton Catholic Church Refectory on A.V. Way just north of Boonville from 9am to 3pm on both Saturday and Sunday, May 2 and 3… #936 - The weekly Boonville Farmers’ Market has finished at the Boonville General Store until the Fall and, following its one day special appearance at The Goat Festival, they are moving to their regular summer venue at the Boonville Hotel parking lot from 10am-12.30pm. Come by with your locally grown or made food or crafts, to sell or trade, or just stop by to shop. For more information, call Cindy at 895-2949… #937 - The A.V. Lending Library run by The Unity Club is open Tuesday and Saturday at The Fairgrounds - Tuesday 1.30pm-4.30pm and Saturday 2pm-4pm… #938 - The County Dump is open from 9am – 4pm Tuesday, Wednesday, Saturday, and Sunday. Remember, no dead animals!... #939 - Local artist Denver Tuttle's Crystalline Point project has a ‘kick-off’ event next Wednesday, April 29 starting at 5pm at Aquarelle in Boonville. There will be food and drinks, entertainment (including the Ukeholics with the Tiny Orchestra of Boonville, CA), art for sale, items for auction, and a raffle to support and promote the Crystalline Point public art project. Find out more about the project at https://www.facebook.com/crystallinepointproject…
    As a bonus P.S.A. here is the menu for the Community lunches and dinners over the next week at the Senior Center at the Veterans’ Building in Boonville. The Center asks for a $6 donation from seniors for both lunches and dinners and charges $7 for Non-seniors for lunches and $8 for the dinners… Tomorrow, Thursday, April 23, the lunch, served by Marti Titus and her crew at Noon, will be Chicken Alfredo, fettuccine, roasted vegetables, garlic bread, kale farro salad, and strawberry dessert… Then, next Tuesday evening, April 28 at 6pm, the dinner will feature Rosemary Pork roast, gravy, cauliflower, bulgur chick-pea salad, raspberry gelatin, and Better cake for dessert. All meals include vegetables, salad bar, and fruit, plus milk, coffee, tea, and lemonade. What a deal - it maybe the best $7 you’ll spend all week!  Hopefully you will be able to attend, and remember – ALL ages are welcome! Hope to see you there…

    Moving quickly on to a few of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge – yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant (yet surprisingly reliable) Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley, a somewhat secret location that sees people get together and share their thoughts about life in Anderson Valley and often far beyond, and where we subscribe to the Winston Churchill philosophy that “A lie will get halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to put on its pants”… So, with that in mind, I’ll put my pants on and continue…
… A couple of insightful observations made at the Historical Society’s Roundtable discussion based on life here in the Valley during the 1970s each resonated with a number of 3-Dot regulars… One was that back then many outsiders coming in to make a new life here found that they needed to work together with the residents for everyone to make a living; in the last couple of decades this has not necessarily been the case and we have witnessed many instances where the influx of people have set up businesses of their own and perhaps relationships with many local folks has not been the same… And secondly, certainly in the last few years, locals have not been invited to undertake much of the construction work that has taken place in the Valley; this work often being performed by folks from outside the area… There are exceptions to both of these comments but, as general observations, they appear to have some validity…
… Surely the list of ‘the foods of the gods’ must contain Heinz baked beans, particularly when served with bacon, sausages and eggs for breakfast. Lemons’ Market in Philo has realized this and in recent months has had their shelves stocked with tins of this ‘delicacy of the lesser deities’… Try some - you can thank me later…
… Despite having a loyal following and enjoying consistent business, Coq au Vin restaurant, the French country style restaurant owned and operated by the Richard family for the last 20 months or so at the Floodgate, is closing due to an ongoing family health issue… May 17 is rumored to be their final night of business… It really is too bad…

    I’m outta here… I’ve got see a man about a sheep… So, until we talk again – ‘Keep the Faith’; be careful out there; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; be wary of strangers with more dogs than teeth; please remember to keep your windows cracked if you have pets in your vehicle; and may your god go with you… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Sometimes poking, often stroking, but almost always humbly yours, Turkey Vulture, thinking you should now that we Turkey Vultures are monogamous and mate for life, and sometimes, to prove our loyalty, we like to indulge in an ‘erotic’ display dance on our nesting grounds…
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at
p.p.s. Keep on humming, Hummingbird… On the sheep, Grace… Everything cool with you, O.J.? Of course it is… Keep on wagging that tail, Fred…

# 454 - 15th April, 2015

        Greetings one and all – if you are sitting comfortably then I shall begin… Following the sad passing of Marianne Pardini, close to three hundred people gathered last Saturday afternoon at The Fairgrounds in Boonville for a poignant memorial. People from the Valley’s different communities were present, all intently listening, in many cases very emotionally, as memories of Marianne were shared. She clearly had a positive impact on all kinds of Valley people, young and old, from brightlighters and back-to-the-land’ers, to the Mexican and old Valley family communities alike, most of whom stayed around after the service to talk with and enjoy the company of family and friends, who were all provided with a tremendously bountiful pot luck…

       It was an all-encompassing Anderson Valley ‘community event’, more so than any I can remember experiencing, and stepson Ernie Pardini perhaps best summed it up with his comment, “I know I've complained on numerous occasions about life here in Anderson Valley, but this recent tragedy has shown me once again why there is no better place in the world to live. The people in the Valley, whether old friends, acquaintances, or complete strangers, have given our family an unimaginable amount of love and support throughout this crisis. I stand in awe every time someone new stops by or calls to offer their sympathy, unable to believe how many people have cared enough to reach out. I have witnessed, despite our terrible loss, humanity at it's finest. I have been left feeling like I am blessed to live among all these incredible people”… (After Ernie’s remarks, there is no need for any other ‘Quote of the Week’)…

       Public Service Announcements (P.S.A.’s)… Calendars and pens at the ready… #812 - The Mendocino Bookmobile returns to the Valley on Tuesday, April 21. They are here on alternate Tuesdays for 45 minutes at each of these places and times: Navarro Store 9am (for just 30 minutes); the Floodgate 12.30pm; Philo 1.30pm; Boonville (Apple Hall) 2.30pm. Phone 463-4694 for further details… #813 - The A.V Museum continues its spring hours of Saturday and Sunday, from 1pm-4pm. Situated in The Little Red Schoolhouse next to the Elementary School on A.V. Way, this is a perfect thing to do in the Valley when you have a couple of hours spare on a weekend afternoon. It is not without reason that it is generally regarded as ‘The Best Little Museum in the West’… #814 - Need a burn permit? You can get one from the Firehouse in Boonville. Call 895-2020 for details or stop by - you will be efficiently served with a smile - trust me on this… #815 - The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital have two upcoming confirmed dates when they will be in the Valley - Thursdays, April 30 and May 14… #816 - The Goat Fest and Wildflower Show will take place on Saturday, April 25 at the Mendocino County Fairgrounds in Boonville, with the Wildflower Show continuing the next day also. The event will feature a full day of Family Fun, Goat Education, and Goat Celebration and along with such fun events as ‘Best Dressed Goat Contest’ and ‘Celebrity Goat Milking Competition,’ there is also a schedule of workshops on two themes:  Goat Dairy Products and Goat Husbandry, plus a Birria (goat stew) Cook-Off, a Zumba-thon, and a dance at The Apple Hall in the evening with Dean Titus, Susan Clark, and the Bootjack 5. If you are interested in being a volunteer, a presenter, or a vendor, please use one of these ways to connect: avgoats@gmail.com; on Facebook at Anderson Valley Goat Fest; or call King Goat, Jim Devine, at (707) 496-8725…

      

       As a bonus P.S.A. here is the menu for the Community lunches over the next week at the Senior Center inside the Veterans’ Building in Boonville. The Center asks for a $6 donation from seniors and charges $7 for Non-seniors… Tomorrow, Thursday, April 16, the lunch, served by Marti Titus and her crew at Noon, will be Smothered steak, brown rice, cauliflower, apple spinach salad, and strawberry lemon squares for dessert… Then, next Tuesday April 21, the lunch will feature Roast beef, potatoes, gravy, carrots, rolls, Bulgur spinach salad, and Banana-split cake for dessert. All meals include vegetables, salad bar, and fruit, plus milk, coffee, tea, and lemonade. What a deal - it maybe the best $7 you’ll spend all week!  Hopefully you will be able to attend, and remember – ALL ages are welcome! Hope to see you there… 

       Moving on to a few of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge – yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant (yet surprisingly reliable) Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley, a somewhat secret location that sees people get together and share their thoughts about life in Anderson Valley and often far beyond, and where we subscribe to the Winston Churchill philosophy that “A lie will get halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to put on its pants”… So, with that in mind, I’ll put my pants on and continue…

… Goat Fest celebrity news - In a special rule amendment for the goat-milking competition, Deputy Craig Walker will not be allowed to used his hoofcuffs on the goat he is milking if she proves difficult and he losing badly to his fellow competitors… Speaking of which, Dr Logan McGhan from the A.V. Health Center, last seen in public display on the stage at the Variety Show being serenaded and, dare I say, mentally molested by the sassy Patty Liddy, has been added to the list of local celebrities for this competition, joining Deputy Walker, and our two school principals, Michelle Hutchins and Donna Pierson-Pugh…

… Talking of ‘celebrities’, a number of regulars have been wondering about the whereabouts of local scribe, Bruce McEwen, ‘America’s Best Court Reporter’, who though contributing his weekly crime-based ‘masterpiece’ to the AVA, has not been seen in these parts in recent weeks. After in-depth research I have discovered that BM decided he could no longer deal with the trappings of fame that have resulted in paparazzi and autograph hunters constantly hounding him during his leisure/drinking time in the Valley and has moved to Ukiah where he is far less well known and where the bars have darker corners in which to sequester oneself than the local establishments. We here at The 3-Dot wish him well and will continue to look forward to his weekly reports on the good, bad, and ugly of Mendocino County…

… Several regulars attended a special and unique event that was held last Sunday at The Grange - the latest installment in the series of Roundtable Discussions put on by the A.V. Historical Society. Having previously covered Valley life in the 1930s/40s in the first Roundtable back in 2012 and then the 1950s/60s during the second one held in the early spring of 2013, on this occasion it was the Valley of the 1970s that was revisited. This was done through the recollections of an entertaining discussion panel comprising a dozen Valley folks, featuring a mix of those who arrived here to start a new life at that time and who never left - Captain Rainbow, Kevin Owens, Morgan Baynham, Linda Brennan, J.R. Collins, Karen Ottobani, and David Severn, plus moderator Mary O’Brien, with those generally of a similar age who were already living here during those years and who ‘welcomed’ the newcomers to the Valley at that time - Gary Johnson, Ernie Pardini, Beryl Thomasson, Carolyn Short and son, Jimmy. For those present it was a most enjoyable afternoon of old Valley stories and memories as once again the Valley’s remarkable past was brought to life and those not there missed a really enlightening journey down Memory Lane, one that I am quite sure many of them would have thoroughly enjoyed… Next year - the 1980s!...

… From our 3-Dot regular, The Old Buzzard, comes another in his insightful series – ‘Signs that the Apocalypse is Approaching’… Buzzard reports, “I could go on and on about all that is wrong with the world as we approach Armageddon, and I often do, but this week how about something a little different and more positive, sort of – some classified ads for you to ponder…

- Free Fox Terrier - 8 years old, Hateful little bastard. Bites…

- Free puppies – Mother is a Kennel Club registered German shepherd; father is a Super Dog, able to leap tall fences with ease…

- Cows and calves for sale: Never bred. Also 1 gay bull for sale… “

       I’m outta here - I’ve got see a man about a sheep… So, until we talk again – ‘Keep the Faith’; be careful out there; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; be wary of strangers with more dogs than teeth; please remember to keep your windows cracked if you have pets in your vehicle; and may your god go with you… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Sometimes poking, often stroking, but almost always humbly yours, Turkey Vulture - pleased in the knowledge that the old hare has returned safely to his burrow…

p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at <turkeyvulture1@earthlink.net>

p.p.s. On the sheep, Grace… Hi, George – hope you and Sheila are well… And it’s a ‘hello darling’ to Silver Swan – behaving yourself? Hopefully not!...

# 453 - 8th April, 2015

        Greetings one and all – if you are sitting comfortably then I shall begin… We are often reminded of how the Valley is remarkable in many ways, some of these perhaps uniquely so, and I suggest that one of those would be the level of volunteerism we enjoy. Well, it’s time to prove that once again. Two local groups are in a real need of some help if they are to continue providing the wonderful gifts to the Valley that they have done up to now. One of these is the Save Hendy Woods group that needs more volunteer staff to work at the shop in the campgrounds for just a few hours a month in that auspicious location. The other is the truly special Anderson Valley Museum that is desperate to find more docents to help at the Little Red Schoolhouse in which the rich history of the Valley is there for all to see. Please give this some serious thought to helping out at these precious Valley venues - you can contact Shelly at Hendy Woods at (707) 489-2245 or online at hendywoodsvolunteer@gmail.com; and Bob and Sandra Nimmons for the Museum volunteers at 707) 895-9020… 

         I suggest we now have some related comments for your Quotes of the Week… Let’s begin with this from Abraham Lincoln, who very wisely observed, “He has a right to criticize, who has a heart to help”… And then there is this from Horace Mann (1796-1859), the American politician and educational reformer, who said, “Doing nothing for others is the undoing of ourselves”… From Richelle E. Goodrich, the modern American novelist and motivational speaker, commented, “It's impossible to be involved in all situations, but there's no excuse not to be involved in something, somewhere, somehow, with someone. Make an ounce of difference”… And how about this classic from Albert Schweitzer (1875-1965) the theologian, organist, philosopher, physician, medical missionary and winner of the Nobel Peace prize in 1952, who remarked, “The interior joy we feel when we have done a good deed is the nourishment the soul requires”… And finally, perhaps as good a reason as any, we have this from Allen Klein (1931-2009), the controversial former manager of The Beatles and Rolling Stones, and an American businessman, talent agent, and record label executive, who came up with, “Research has shown that people who volunteer often live longer”… Sign me up!...

       Public Service Announcements (P.S.A.’s)… Calendars and pens at the ready… #365 - The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital have two upcoming April dates when they will be in the Valley - tomorrow, April 9 and again in three week’s time on April 30. As usual, the venue and time is the A.V. Farm Supply from 2-4pm and new customers are always welcome. Previous visitors should be aware that they can call 462-8833 and the vets will bring your pet’s charts with them - making this an even better service than it already is!… #366 - The Anderson Valley Grange is having its regular second Sunday Pancake Breakfast on April 11, from 8:30-11am. Prices range from $5-10 - kids through hungry folks, for a delicious, locally-sourced breakfast. Choices include pancakes (gluten free available), eggs, and bacon, with a choice of juice, tea or coffee included… #367 - Immediately following the Pancake Breakfast at The Grange, beginning at 1.30pm, we have the next installment in the series of Roundtable Discussions put on by the A.V. Historical Society to which you are cordially invited. Having previously covered the 1930s/40s in the first roundtable and then the 1950s/60s during the second one, on this occasion it is the Valley of the 1970s that will be revisited through the recollections of a discussion panel featuring a dozen or so Valley folks gathered from those who lived here during those years plus those who arrived in the Valley to start a new life at that time and who never left. This is the Society’s big annual event and everyone is encouraged to attend what will surely be a fascinating afternoon of old Valley stories and memories… #368 - The Goat Fest and Wildflower Show will take place on Saturday, April 25 at the Mendocino County Fairgrounds in Boonville. Let me hand you over to King Goat, Jim Devine, who has this to say, “The First Annual A.V. Goat Festival is really coming along. An excellent crew of local food activists and goat enthusiasts are working hard to create a full day of Family Fun, Goat Education, and Goat Celebration. Along with such fun events as ‘Best Dressed Goat Contest’ and ‘Celebrity Goat Milking Competition,’ we are developing an all day schedule of workshops on two themes:  Goat Dairy Products and Goat Husbandry. We are also hosting a Birria Cook-Off, a Zumba-thon, and a dance at The Apple Hall. As you might imagine, we have plenty of opportunities for people to get involved. If you are interested in being a volunteer, a presenter, or a vendor, please use one of these ways to connect: avgoats@gmail.com; on Facebook at Anderson Valley Goat Fest; or call me at (707) 496-8725”… #369 - I nearly forgot but tonight (April 8) at The Grange, certain folks might like to know that it is the monthly drumming session from 7-9pm. Call Rob at 895-3897 or Andy at 895-3020 for further details…

       As a bonus P.S.A., here is the menu for the Community lunches and dinners over the next week at the Senior Center at the Veterans’ Building in Boonville. The Center asks for a $6 donation from seniors for both lunches and dinners and charges $7 for Non-seniors for lunches and $8 for the dinners… Tomorrow, Thursday, April 9, the lunch, served by Marti Titus and her crew at Noon, will be Smothered steak, brown rice, cauliflower, apple spinach salad, and strawberry lemon squares for dessert … Then, next Tuesday evening, April 14 at 6pm, the dinner will feature Ham, potluck potatoes, carrots, rolls, orange gelatin, Kale-Barley salad, and Kahlua cake. As this is the 2nd Tuesday of the month, the dinner will be followed by Bingo at 7pm... All meals include vegetables, salad bar, and fruit, plus milk, coffee, tea, and lemonade. What a deal - it maybe the best $7 you’ll spend all week!  Hopefully you will be able to attend, and remember – ALL ages are welcome! Hope to see you there…

 

       Moving quickly on to a few of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge – yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant (yet surprisingly reliable) Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley, a somewhat secret location that sees people get together and share their thoughts about life in Anderson Valley and often far beyond…

… In the northwest end of the Valley (Christine Woods/Floodgate area), and elsewhere too I am told, residents endured two nights of sleeplessness this past week as a result of the Noise Pollution provided by certain unconcerned neighbors in the wine industry (who were obviously absent and sleeping deeply in their ivory towers, wherever they may be)… Both nights reached 2-Helicopters on the Frost Protection Fan Index - that’s pretty damn loud… I thought you should know…

… Let’s move on from these particularly thoughtless vineyard owners adversely affecting the lives of Deep Enders to some folks who have a true sense of community spirit for Valley life - the Anderson Valley Lions Club… I was part of a fine turnout at the Apple Hall for their Easter Breakfast to benefit the Little League Baseball program last Sunday and once again they did a splendid job. (I think my second helping of ham, eggs, and pancakes was even better than the first - it would have been rude to refuse)… I would have liked to have stayed around for the ensuing Easter Egg hunt and shown those 4th graders how we Turkey Vultures do such things, but I felt the urgent need for a Bloody Mary and took care of that by heading down the street to The Buckhorn where they make the County’s finest such Sunday ‘pick-me-up’ … I know you understand…

… A reliable rumor at the 3-Dot is that among the celebrities competing in the goal-milking contest at the upcoming Goat Fest (Sat, April 25 - see above, P.S.A. #369) will be Sheriff’s Deputy Craig Walker and our two school principles, Michelle Hutchins and Donna Pierson-Pugh… Should be worth seeing, I think you’d agree…

… ‘Say it ain’t so’… It was pointed out by a concerned regular that there is an application to change the ownership of the beer and wine license at Coq au Vin Restaurant now posted on the window of that fine establishment. Without knowing for sure, one assumes that this means they are closing after being in business at the Floodgate for a couple of months short of two years. The new owners on the application, under the name of The Bewildered Pig (a St. Helena based business claiming to be ‘purveyors of gastronomic pleasantries), will have some large and very tasty shoes to fill… If it happens, and I am told there are some hoops to still jump through, this development really is a loss to the Valley - the French country cuisine provided a wonderful treat for many folks in the Valley and beyond, and the warm hospitality of the Richard family running the operation is certainly up there with the best… 

       I’m outta here… Besides I’ve got see a man about a sheep… So, until we talk again – ‘Keep the Faith’; be careful out there; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; be wary of strangers with more dogs than teeth; please remember to keep your windows cracked if you have pets in your vehicle; and may your god go with you… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Sometimes poking, often stroking, but almost always humbly yours, Turkey Vulture - still wallowing in the honor of having the 2nd tallest tree (343.6 feet) in Hendy Woods named after me and my ilk…

p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at <turkeyvulture1@earthlink.net>

p.p.s. Keep on wagging that tail, Fred… Is that ‘lafter’ I hear, Carroll?... Welcome back, Round-eyed Robin…

# 452 - 1st April, 2015

          Greetings one and all – if you are sitting comfortably then I shall begin… Any overly obsessed sports fans of the victorious S.F. Giants will be no doubt be happy to hear that they can wallow in the scent of the team’s recent successes whenever they feel like it - literally. Yes, the Giants have announced that throughout the 2015 season they will be selling a fragrance that smells like their stadium! The $25 perfume, given the name ‘Victory,’ features a whiff of oils used in various locations at AT&T Park, including the players' massage area, the fresh-cut outfield, and leather from boss Bruce Bochy’s dugout seat. Season-ticket holders will be given the first option to buy this unique item when the home opener is played on Monday April 13 against the Colorado Rockies. I guess winning the World Series three times in five years allows a team to entice the fans to show their support in whatever way they can… I look forward to smelling you!…

       As mentioned previously, a very special event will be held in the Valley on Sunday, April 12 at The Grange on Highway 128 beginning at 1.30pm. It’s the next installment in the series of Roundtable Discussions put on by the A.V. Historical Society to which you are cordially invited. Having previously covered the 1930s/40s in the first Roundtable back in 2012 and then the 1950s/60s during the second one held in the early spring of 2013, on this occasion it is the Valley of the 1970s that will be revisited. This will be done through the recollections of a lively and informative discussion panel comprising a dozen or so Valley folks featuring a mix of those who arrived here to start a new life at that time and who never left, with those of a similar age who were already living here during those years and who ‘welcomed’ the newcomers to the Valley at that time. It should be quite an enlightening occasion! This is the Society’s ‘big’ annual event and Valley residents of all ages and backgrounds are encouraged to attend what will surely be a fascinating afternoon of old Valley stories and memories as once again the Valley’s remarkable past is brought to life. Snacks and refreshments will be available along with a selection of Valley history books for sale. All proceeds will go to the A.V. Museum - a great Valley cause in my humble opinion…

       On to the rest of the Public Service Announcements (P.S.A.’s)… Calendars and pens at the ready… #510 - The Boonville Big Band returns to Lauren’s Restaurant in Boonville on Saturday, April 4. The show begins at 9pm and the cover is $5… #511 - The annual Easter Breakfast and Egg Hunt at The Fairgrounds presented by the A.V. Lions to benefit the Teen Center is also this coming weekend. It runs from 8am-noon on, not surprisingly, Easter Sunday, April 5. The Egg Hunt begins promptly at noon for kids up to and including 4th-grade… #512 - The Mendocino Bookmobile returns to the Valley on Tuesday, April 7. They are here on alternate Tuesdays for 45 minutes at each of these places and times: Navarro Store 9am (for just 30 minutes); the Floodgate 12.30pm; Philo 1.30pm; Boonville (Apple Hall) 2.30pm. Phone 463-4694 for further details… #513 - The A.V. Drumming Circle meets from 7pm to 9pm at The Grange on the second Wednesday of each month - that is a week from today, April 8. Call Rob at 895-3897 or Andy at 895-3020 for further details… #514 - The Vets from the Mendocino Animal Hospital have two upcoming confirmed dates when they will be in the Valley - Thursdays, April 9 and 30… #515 - Need a burn permit? You can get one from the Firehouse in Boonville. Call 895-2020 for details or stop by - you will be efficiently served with a smile - trust me on this… #516 - The A.V Museum continues its spring hours of Saturday and Sunday, from 1pm-4pm. Situated in The Little Red Schoolhouse next to the Elementary School on A.V. Way, this is a perfect thing to do in the Valley when you have a couple of hours spare on a weekend afternoon. It is not without reason that it is generally regarded as ‘The Best Little Museum in the West’…

       As a bonus P.S.A. here is the menu for the Community lunches over the next week at the Senior Center at the Veterans’ Building in Boonville. The Center asks for a $6 donation from seniors and charges $7 for Non-seniors… Tomorrow, Thursday, April 2, the lunch, served by Marti Titus and her crew at Noon, will be the very popular first feast of the month - Meatloaf, mashed potatoes, gravy, rolls, peas, farro salad, with Birthday Cup cakes for dessert… Then, next Tuesday, April 7, the lunch will feature Chicken pot pie, rolls, broccoli salad, tabbouleh salad, strawberry spinach salad, and chocolate amoretto dessert. All meals include vegetables, salad bar, and fruit, plus milk, coffee, tea, and lemonade. What a deal - maybe the best $7 you spend all week! Hopefully you will be able to attend, and remember – ALL ages are welcome! Hope to see you there… 

       Moving quickly on to a few of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week at The Three-Dot Lounge – yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant (and surprisingly reliable) Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley, a somewhat secret location that sees people get together and share their thoughts about life in Anderson Valley and often far beyond…

... Many 3-Dot regulars were amused and maybe concerned by my story of flying over the Barn Sale Field beside Hwy 128 just north of Boonville last Sunday afternoon. As I observed below, I spotted two ‘shepherds’ wrestling with a number of sheep inside the corrals there. I continued on my journey downtown but, on my return through the Valley an hour later, I swooped down as the gentlemen were leaving, covered in mud, and clearly exhausted. They both spoke with English accents so my suspicions were obviously aroused. I asked them how their afternoon had gone and one sheepishly replied – ‘It went very well, thank you, but don’t believe a word those sheep tell you – this is a Valley where men are men and sheep are lying little buggers...’

... Rumors have it that as many as three, four, or perhaps even all five seats on the School Board may be up for election later this year. I cannot confirm this, and some of the numbers certainly sound a little far-fetched, but it’s what I’ve heard from a couple of sources so I guess we’ll see… No, no, no - thanks for your support but I couldn’t possibly run for such a position. Although if I did, and won, you can be sure I’d push for three immediate changes: more homework – two hours a night never harmed me in my junior and senior years at Bird of Prey Academy; more chickens laying those delicious eggs in the Ag. Department; and obviously squished-squirrel pie on the lunch menu... Obviously these forward-thinking ideas would all be up for discussion at the very first meeting...

... I must share with you a number of the Valley’s geographical developments reviewed at the 3-Dot in recent weeks… I am told that there is a ‘sub-suburb’ in Downtown Boonville that few folks are aware of. Most of you probably know by now that the east side of Hwy 128 stretching from Lauren’s Restaurant south to Mi Esperanza and the auto shop (ending just before the Ricard Building abomination that is the sub-suburb of Disgracefulville) is referred to in modern parlance as SoBo - for South Boonville. However, the west side of Hwy 128 over this stretch, from Rossi’s Hardware store to Donald Pardini’s wonderful old house, a few hundred feet to the south, has a different name. As those two places are homes to dogs called Duke, this small area is known as Dukeville - excellent, I like it... With both ‘Midtown’ Boonville (not to be confused with Midtown Manhattan) - running from the Post Office to Lambert Lane on the west and the A.V. Market to The Buckhorn on the east, and also ‘Uptown’ - stretching from the Boonville Hotel to the Drive-In on the west and The General Store building to Boont Berry and the caboose on the east, also coming under the all-encompassing name of ‘Downtown Boonville’, it would seem to suggest that in the heart of the Valley we’ve pretty much got a ‘metropolitan area’!... Ha! Ha! Ha!...

       Finally this week, for those of you who were already thinking of buying yourself a bottle of ‘Victory’ I must tell you that this was an April Fools’ Day story… Oh, dear, you’ve already tried to order some - please forgive me…

       Well now I think it’s time to take my leave… Besides I’ve got see a man about a sheep… So, until we talk again – ‘Keep the Faith’; be careful out there; stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; be wary of strangers with more dogs than teeth; please remember to keep your windows cracked if you have pets in your vehicle; and may your god go with you… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Sometimes poking, often stroking, but almost always humbly yours, Turkey Vulture - pleased in the knowledge that the old hare has returned safely to his burrow…

p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at <turkeyvulture1@earthlink.net>

p.p.s. On the sheep, Grace… Hi, Silver Swan – behaving yourself? Hopefully not!... Bobwhite Quail - keep up the knitting!