# 364 - July 24th, 2013
Greetings one and all – if you are sitting comfortably
then I shall begin… Well there is no doubt that ‘Cat Heaven’ is an even better
place following the arrival of O.J., the 19-year old ‘Top Cat,’ who was
welcomed there last week. This huge-hearted fellow was the leader of cats and
kittens; the friend of dogs and puppies; and a cherished family member. R.I.P.,
buddy – you were the Coolest of the Cool…
Regular
readers will be aware that my diet is not always the healthiest and I can no
doubt fascinate you even more when I reveal that I do not eat any ‘junk’ food
or candy of any kind, and never have a dessert, unless it’s got chocolate in it
of course! However, I could certainly do better in terms of healthier eating, but
not to the degree that some folks go. For example, what is it with this current
obsession with ‘gluten-free’ food? For the past six months or so, this
‘movement’ has been the leading new food trend in this country. Obviously,
those with wheat, barley and rye allergies should follow suit but, as for the
rest of us, is it just another fad or a topic to bore your friends with?
It
sounds like an unfolding epidemic: A decade ago, virtually no one in the U.S.
seemed to have a problem eating gluten in bread and other foods. Now, millions
do. Gluten-free products are flying off grocery shelves, and restaurants are
boasting of meals with no gluten. Celebrities on TV talk shows chat about the
digestive discomfort they blame on the wheat protein they now shun. Some
churches even offer gluten-free Communion wafers. Faddishness is a big part of
it. The best estimates are that more than half the consumers buying these
products don’t have any clear-cut reaction to gluten. They buy gluten-free
because they think it will help them lose weight or because they mistakenly
believe they are sensitive to gluten.
Foods
to avoid according to the ‘G-Free’ folks are: Beer, Breads, Cakes and pies,
Candies, Carrion Deer, Carrion Sheep, Cereals, Cookies and crackers, Croutons,
French fries, Gravies, Pastas. Processed luncheon meats, Salad dressings,
Seasoned rice mixes, Seasoned snack foods, such as potato and tortilla chips,
Self-basting poultry, Skunks, Soups and soup bases, Squirrels, and Vegetables
in sauce.
I
guess if I eat any of this stuff regularly, some of which I do, then instead of
dying at 93½ I will leave this mortal coil at 93 from skin cancer as a result
of bicycling in the sun too often without a hat on!… Just a few days ago I
heard two neighborhood six-year olds talking and one offered the other her
potato chips. The kid’s first question was ‘Are they gluten-free?’ I mentioned
this to her Dad who says he thinks the kid might be sensitive to gluten. She
has stomachaches. Nothing to do with the gallons of coca-cola she drinks I’m
sure… Dear, oh dear, it was all I could do to stop myself from saying to the
Dad, ‘Shove yer gluten-free up your gluteus maximus!’… Enough already - I’m off
for a skunk sandwich on rye and a few beers…
Public
Service Announcements… Calendars and pens at the ready… #376 – Next visit to
the Valley by the vets from Mendocino Animal Hospital will be Thursday, August
8 – their only visit that month… #377 - As The Pot Shop in Philo celebrates 25
years, ceramic artist, Alexis Moyer invites everyone to stop in for a special
Anniversary Party on Saturday, July 27 11am to 4pm. Light refreshments will be
served. For more information call 707 895-2810…
#378
– “The ‘Really-Quite-Difficult Living Fair’ as it is known to many of us, but
officially it’s ‘The Not-So-Simple Living Fair’, returns over the weekend of
July 26-28. This event, one celebrating and sharing rural skills with various
workshops, demonstrations, discussions, and food, takes place at The
Fairgrounds and the website with all the details and schedule is at http://notsosimple.info… #379 – Remember
when the movie crews came to the Valley last summer? Well the ‘fruits of their
labors’ are now complete and we get the chance to see the ‘world premier’ of
‘Goodbye World’, presented as a fundraiser for the A.V. Education Foundation.
This event is on Friday, August 2 at The Grange on Hwy 128. Doors open at
5.30pm for a social hour featuring a variety of small plates along with beer,
wine, and soft drinks. The movie is shown at 7pm with a Q & A afterwards
(about 8.30pm) with the film’s director, Denis Henley. Tickets are $15 per
adult and $7 for children 17 and under and are available at Laughing Dog
Bookstore, All That Good Stuff, and Lemon's Market. Funds raised from the
event will help support the Education Foundation's three primary
activities: Summer Internships, Scholarships and Grants… #380 – The monthly
Barn Sale returns on Sat/Sun, Aug 3 and 4, at The Big Barn on A.V. Way just
north of Boonville, and runs from 10am to 3pm each day…
As a bonus
P.S.A. here is the menu for the next week at the Senior Center at the Veterans
Hall in Boonville… The Center asks for a $5 donation from seniors and charges
$7 for Non-Seniors for lunches and for the dinners it is $6 and $8,
respectively… Tomorrow, Thursday, July 25, the lunch, served at 12.15pm, will
be Cheeseburgers, Tabbouleh Salad, Macaroni Salad, Peanut Butter/ Chocolate
Bars … Then next Tuesday, June 25 at 6pm, the dinner served by Marti Titus and
her crew will be BBQ Ribs, Garlic Pasta, Cauliflower, Barley Salad, Broccoli
Salad, Lemon Pineapple Pie… This is also Game Night so bring your favorite game
to play or hang out and visit with friends… Remember, all ages are welcome!... Hope
to see you there…
Moving quickly
on to a few of the topics and Valley events under discussion this week at The
Three-Dot Lounge – yes it’s “Moans, Groans, Good Thoughts, and Rampant (and
often Reliable) Rumors” from my favorite gathering place in the Valley where
people get together and share their thoughts about life in A.V.… This week we
go out to the back of the Lounge and visit the Three-Dot’s Dog Garden to get a
different perspective…
… Heartworms can be a definite problem among our
four-legged friends around here so I urge you save lots of pain and anguish,
not to mention vet bills, by getting a very good preventative. Heartgard is a
chewable treat that will cost you about 20 cents a day for a medium-sized dog
and might very well save your dogs life… Furthermore, I would suggest K9
Advantix II for flea and tick control. This is about 35 cents a day… The five
dogs here at The Nest have never had a problem with any of these nasty little
bastards ever since they were put on a regular, once-a-month treatment several
years ago. Both of these medications are available at 1-800-PetMeds…
… Just wondering - is there any more mournful look than
that of a dog, who loves his/her owner unconditionally with all of his heart,
after being scolded by that owner and not knowing the reason? He could not
possibly be any more sad and confused. Just something to think about when
disciplining our four-legged friends – something they often need but which will
only be effective if done in a correct and timely fashion…
... More missing dogs in the Valley this past week and
so once again I want to pass on my belief in the need to get tags for you dogs,
or better still have them micro-chipped. The tags are easy and cheap at www.tagxpress.com
and all those hard working volunteers at the Animal Rescue, plus the many other
animal lovers in The Valley, will certainly appreciate it…
… And finally, from our 3-Dot regular, The Old Buzzard,
comes another in his insightful series - ‘The Approach of the Apocalypse’...
Buzzard reports, “The ‘dog days’ of summer are here and that means it’s time to
reiterate my ‘Five Rules of the Road’ for these parts, the breaking of any of
which surely goes to show that the Apocalypse is fast approaching… #1. All
drivers shall follow the rules of the road. That most definitely includes
California Vehicle Code # 21656 – ‘Slower vehicles must pull over to allow
others to pass’. Furthermore, we shall have no driving over 60mph anywhere and
no driving under 40mph in the 55mph limit without pulling over in the Valley’s
many turnouts to let others pass. Of course driving at 30mph or less in town is
to be strictly enforced, with very grave consequences for those who do not
follow these guidelines. Do I hear ‘feed ‘em to the pigs’ from anyone?... #2. All
drivers parking at 90 degrees to the sidewalk outside businesses and stores
will have their vehicles egged. Eggs will be paid for (upon proof of receipt
and photograph of the eggs on the windscreen) by Captain Rainbow, as failing to
park parallel to the sidewalk is his pet peeve and he wants to see the practice
brought to an end more than any of us... #3. Residents will be asked to
'verbally confront' the ‘biker hordes’ when those weekend visitors (mostly
accountants, bankers, and lawyers posing in their rarely worn, stiff and shiny
leathers, pretending to be ‘rebels’) arrive this summer and annoyingly
begin revving up their very noisy Harley motorbikes. From now on hopefully
they will be pointed at and told, "Don’t be late at the office on Monday
morning". What are they going to do? Throw their man-purses at
us?... #4. Caltran workers who are standing around doing nothing will not
be allowed to scowl menacingly at drivers as they pass. It’s not clever, funny,
or even that menacing, but it does seem to keep many of them from their work
for long periods of time... And #5 – Try to remember that when driving you are
surrounded by many members of the public with whom you would not dream of
interacting in any other situation. While most are considerate, are aware of
their surroundings and follow driving etiquette, some are aggressive, some are
rude, and some are just plain stupid. It is what it is, and I would suggest a
policy of ‘smile and drive-on’ is the only way to deal with this. As my friend,
the self-proclaimed wise Turkey Vulture, likes to say, ‘Trust me on this; you
can thank me later’…”
I’m
outta here… So, until we talk again – ‘Keep the Faith’; be careful out there;
stay out of the ditches; think good thoughts; please remember to keep your
windows cracked if you have pets in your vehicle; and may your god go with
you… Oh, and of course, one final request, “Let us prey”… Humbly yours, Turkey
Vulture ……
p.s. You can contact me with words of support/abuse
either through the Letters Page or by e-mail at <turkeyvulture1@earthlink.net>
p.p.s. Hi, Silver Swan – behaving yourself? Hopefully
not!
p.p.s. On the sheep, Grace…
posted by Turkey Vulture @ 9:03 AM
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